Total Drama: Favorites vs Not Favorites
by SecretAgent12
Summary: Chris is back with twenty-two old contestants who have never won a season and are either loved or hated by fans. Accompanied by Chef and an unnecessarily long title, he plans to put these contestants through challenges in one of the most hostile environments on Earth, the African savannah.
1. E1: The Title Could Be Shorter Part 1

**Hey worldwide,**

 **So I've tried doing comp fics in the past, and I've never actually gotten past the first elimination, but no more! I will actually finish a fic I've started. This idea went through several phases and rough drafts and while I still don't have the whole thing planned out, I'm fully confident in my ability to finish it. So without further ado, enjoy!**

 **Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

* * *

Chris stood in front of the cameras, squinting as he was forced to look in the direction of the hot African sun. An arid breeze swept across his, making him flush. He adjusted his collar and wiped off the sweat forming on his brow. The cameras clicked on and signaled Chris to start talking.

"Last time on Total Drama: Sky and Shawn, with the help of Dave and Jasmine, competed for the prize on Pahkitew Island. Things got a bit…er…intense with Dave going psycho and trying to kill Sky. In the end, it was Zombie Boy Shawn that won the million dollars, and a girlfriend. Kind of boring, but better than going to Sky who acted kind of sketchy with her whole 'trick Dave into liking me thing'. Anyway, we're back for an all new season of Total Drama. And this one's going to be even better than before. This is Total…Drama…Favorites vs. Not Favorites!"

 _*music starts*_

Cameras begin to pop out of various locations on the savannah. One lifts up a lion cub and the other bumps into a rhino.

 _Dear Mom and Dad I'm doin' fine,_

Chris and Chef are driving in a Jeep, until Topher pops up from the backseat and they swerve into a small river.

 _You guys are on my mind._

In the river, Harold is practicing his "mad skills" on a rock, until that rock rises out of the water and reveals itself to be a hippo.

 _You asked me what I wanted to be_

Jasmine swoops down, picks Harold up, and jumps to the shore where a jealous Leshawna is waiting.

 _And now I think the answer is plain to see,_

Sugar and Ezekiel chase after a couple of warthogs, but lose them in the brush. They end up stopping at the safari lodge.

 _I wanna be famous._

The camera cuts to inside the lodge, where Staci is chattering to a slightly irritated Sadie and an indifferent Noah.

 _I wanna live close to the sun,_

In one of the rooms, Dave is being forced to watch Leonard practice his "magic".

 _Go pack your bags, 'cause I've already won,_

Dave runs out to the balcony and jumps towards the pool.

 _Everything to prove, nothing in my way_

Outside the lodge, Scarlett observes Amy and Samey as the twins are trapped up in a tree by a pack of hyenas. She jots down some notes when Amy pushes Samey onto the lowest branch.

 _I'll get there one day._

Max runs up and steals her notes, prompting her to chase after him.

 _Cause, I wanna be famous!_

Back at the pool, Dave lands on a beach umbrella and tumbles into the water. Brick jumps in to save him.

 _Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na!_

Bridgette and Geoff are making out in the hot bub while Dawn meditates peacefully (and eerily) in the background.

 _I wanna be, I wanna be, I wanna be famous_

As the camera moves towards Courtney, she furiously shoves it towards Trent, who's playing his guitar.

 _I wanna be, I wanna be, I wanna be famous_

Max and Scarlett arrive at the pool, but B ends up taking back the notes with an invention of his. He uses the invention to pick up Max and throw him in the pool.

 _(Whistling in tune)_

* * *

"And this time it's taking place in the middle of the savannah, somewhere in Tanzania, Africa," Chris continued.

The camera panned around to show the dry, desert-like landscape of Tanzania. A small dirt road carved through a field of tall grass. There was a rumbling sound as a Jeep slowly came to a stop in front of Chris.

"What are they doing here?!" Chris stammered. He looked over at Chef, who shrugged. "The jeeps don't arrive until after the intro-"

"Chris!" A female voice shouted from inside the Jeep. The door was kicked open and Leshawna climbed out. "You have a lot of explaining to do," the black girl said angrily. "First you throw me out a plane, then make me sit on the sidelines for two seasons, just to rope me back in for another one of these stupid competitions?"

"That sounds about right," Chris admitted, irritated Leshawna was here so early. "I was just explaining how the season takes place in-"

"Ooh Chris," Topher said giddily, running towards the host. "Introduce me before you continue explaining, _please_?!"

Chris sighed. "Oh look, it's Topher, who only came back because Tyler didn't want to leave Lindsay to participate," the host deadpanned.

"We had a choice?" Leshawna asked, still pissed.

"Some of you did," Chris explained. "We gave a choice to the ones who fit the theme of this season a little less. Speaking of which, this season is all about-"

"PARTYING!" Cheered a blonde guy wearing a pink shirt and a cowboy hat. Geoff jumped out of the open back of the Jeep and landed on the ground. He grabbed his bags and jogged over to Chris. "Chris, wassup?" He held out his fist.

"Oh…you know," Chris replied. "Just trying to finish my damn intro before the rest of you get here." Geoff took a step back.

"That's harsh bro, chill out." Chris's eyes narrowed and Geoff joined Leshawna and Topher. "Leshawna, what's up?"

"Nothing much my brother," Leshawna fist-bumped him. She cast a glance over at Topher before looking back at Geoff. "Uh…do you know this fool?"

Geoff scratched his head and tilted his hat. "I think he's one of those new people. From that season after All-Stars."

"That's right!" Topher exclaimed. "I am Topher, the Chris 2.0, a self-given title. As you may have noticed, my main gimmick is to be exactly like Chris."

Leshawna laughed. "Hon, why would you wanna be anything like Chris Mclean?" She said his last name as if she had a sour taste in her mouth.

"I'm right here you know," Chris complained.

"You don't understand," Topher explained. "I don't want to be _like_ Chris physically, I mean do you see how old he is? I want to _be_ Chris, as in a host…of Total Drama!"

"They'll never replace me," Chris told him arrogantly. "It's a horrible idea. I make Total Drama…well…Total Drama."

"I don't know man, it might be a good idea," Geoff admitted. "This show could use a fresh new face and he seems more energetic-"

"Finish that sentence and I'm going to eliminate you right now before you even have the chance to see your girlfriend," Chris said flatly.

Geoff's eyes lit up. "Oh man, that's right! Bridgette's going to be here. Far out man!"

"Just let me do my intro," Chris sighed. "Wait, weren't there two other people on your Jeep?"

"Of course there were Chris," Topher smirked. "Your old age must be affecting your memory because I certainly remember who was on that jeep, and you probably don't."

"Wasn't hard," Leshawna mumbled. "Those two white girls fought the whole way here. Better check to make sure one of them ain't dead."

The back door of the Jeep opened up and a pale blonde girl stuck her head out. "Let me out Amy," she grunted. An arm reached out and grabbed her hair, pulling her back in. The door slammed shut, before opening again and a girl identical to the previous one, save for a mole on her cheek, was trying to get out.

"As if I'd ever let the camera see you before me, _Sparemy_ ," the girl who clearly wasn't Sparemy snapped. She tumbled out of the jeep and the other girl pounced on her. The two twins tumbled around in the dirt before looking up at Chris and the other cast members. Topher, Geoff, and Leshawna were looking at them with mild interest and annoyance.

"Everyone, meet Amy and Samey," Chris announced.

"It's Sammy, actually," the girl without the mole corrected. Amy just pushed her back down into the dirt and laughed.

"Girl what is your problem?" Leshawna asked Amy. "The whole car ride here you was actin' like a basic white bitch to everyone. And not just to yo' sister. You better clean up yo' act before we vote yo' ass out."

Amy began to sniffle. "You're right…it's just-" She shoved Samey down again as she started to get up. "-That's not my problem." She smirked and stood next to Topher. Leshawna just glared at her. Samey stood up again, relieved not to be pushed over, and frowned at her sister. Amy just stuck her tongue out at her.

"Man, that was harsh," Geoff whispered to Leshawna.

"Mhm," Leshawna agreed. "Guess she'll be an easy out though. As long as we can tell which one is which. Or we could just cut 'em both."

Another jeep was pulling up to replace the first one. The door opened and a petite blonde girl exited the vehicle. Her face was a bit flushed due to the heat, and the sweater and leggings were helping her. She walked peacefully over to the crowd. "Greetings friends, I will enjoy our time spent together as we bond over this competition and the inevitable pain that will be cast upon us by the vile host."

"Oh Dawn you're making me blush," Chris swooned mockingly.

"Fucking loser," Amy coughed. Dawn just frowned and went to stand next to Leshawna.

"Hello there," she said sweetly.

"Wassup girl?" Leshawna asked. "You sure you want to be out here in this heat with that sweater on?"

"I'm quite alright thank you. I don't foresee having any problems with the temperature here, but I appreciate your concern."

"No…problem," Leshawna said awkwardly, shifting away from the aura whisperer and toward Geoff.

"Next we have Scarlett!" Chris announced, making some of the contestants gasp. The redheaded evil maniac exited the car, her arms being held behind her back by two large security guards.

"Let go of me you C-average imbeciles!" Scarlett spat. "The terms of my parole promise me early release if I don't kill anyone, so don't make me lose my one shot at freedom!"

"So how's it going Scarlett?" Chris asked. "Enjoy your time in prison?"

"It's called a secure mental ward," Scarlett corrected, struggling with the guards a bit more. "I'd have escaped normal prison by now."

Chris shrugged. "Whatever. You guys are free to go," he said to the guards. "There was one more person in the Jeep with you right?" The guards shook their heads. "No? Hm, maybe he's on the next one."

Scarlett stood next to Amy, glaring at her as the blonde continuously poked Samey's ribcage. The guards left in their Jeep and another one quickly replaced it. Out of the passenger seat came a tall guy with an Elvis style haircut.

"Long-time veteran that hasn't seen some screen time for four seasons, Trent!" Chris cheered. Trent waved at the camera.

"Hey guys, it's great to be back," he said, smiling and fist-bumping Geoff.

"Trent my man!" Geoff hollered. "How you been dude?"

"Pretty sweet," Trent replied. "I've been trying to get the attention of some record labels, but the whole 'reality show fame' has kind of dried up. That's why I'm pumped for this season since I'll be getting my name back out there. Who knows, maybe I'll see Gwen again."

"Gwen won't be competing this season," Chris said. "She's probably too busy kissing Cameron's ear like they did in the All-Stars finale."

"You mean your worst-rated season ever?" Topher said, poking Chris's shoulder. The host with the most shoved him aside and got ready to introduce the next contestant. Trent went back to standing with Leshawna and Geoff, a little sadder now.

"Don't let him get you down man," Geoff said, putting a hand on Trent's shoulder. "You're doing your own thing here, Gwen's doing her own thing…wherever. It's all good."

"Please stop talking," Scarlett said in disgust, shaking her head. "Your words are like rat poison to any healthy brain cells."

Before Geoff could fire back a reply, the next contestant exited the Jeep. He was dressed in combat boots, shorts, and a tight green shirt that showed off his muscles. A pair of shiny dog-tags hung from around his neck.

"Greetings contestants!" He barked, giving them a salute and standing ramrod straight. A few contestants gave him awkward salutes while others just rolled their eyes.

"It's Brick, the pants-wetting, fashion-challenge cadet from Revenge of the Island!"

"He's also the number one choice for who should have been in All-Stars from the second generation," Topher added.

"Nobody cares Topher," Chris sighed. "Brick stand with the others, unless you've got someone you want to talk to that will make you interesting this season."

Brick just shrugged and stood next to Dawn. "Morning Cadet Dawn, how are you?"

Dawn giggled. "Quite excellent Brick, thank you. How was your drive here?"

"Pretty good," Brick said. "Yours?"

Dawn shifted uncomfortably. "I would have preferred a mode of transportation that was less hazardous for the environment," her expression darkened and then turned back to normal, "but that just can't be helped!"

"Right…" Brick said, getting uncomfortable. "Well it's good seeing you again."

"You too!" Dawn replied happily.

"Gosh why did I have to sit in the middle?!" The next contestant complained as he fell out of the backseat and got up, cracking his back and stretching. He was a scrawny, pale, ginger with glasses and a lame shirt with a hamburger on it. It was Harold.

"Because you're a loser!" Said the contestant after him. She was a slim preppy girl with dark skin and really tight pants. She shoved Harold aside and walked towards Chris. "There better be a good, _legal_ explanation for why I'm here again." She said simply.

"Nice to see you too Courtney," Chris said, ignoring her request. "I'd tell you to go stand with the others, but you skipped over poor Harold over there."

"And that's a bad thing because…" Courtney asked, confused.

"Gosh Courtney, I deserve to be here just as much as you do," Harold said, walking over to Chris. He stretched his legs, grabbing a shoulder for support. Unfortunately he ended up grabbing Courtney's shoulder.

"Don't touch me!" She shrieked, backhanding the poor nerd. The others gasped as Harold hit the ground again.

"Oh hell to the no," Leshawna said, rolling up her already short enough sleeves. She stormed over to Courtney. "You did not just backhand my little, white sugar-baby. You _did not_ just do that."

"I'm you…sugar-baby?" Harold asked from the ground. "Does that mean sugar-baby can have a hand getting back up?"

"Later," Leshawna said sternly. "I have to feed Miss CIT her knuckle-sandwich.

"I could take you on with my eyes shut," Courtney fired back, getting up in Leshawna's face.

"Hold my hoops!" Leshawna snapped, starting to take off her earrings. Chris immediately got between the two.

"I knew there was a reason we invited you both back," Chris said happily. "Now go stand over on opposite ends of the crowd."

Leshawna gave one last glare at Courtney. "Girl, you are going home first elimination, ya hear?"

Courtney laughed. "My lawyers and I reviewed the contract three times over. I know the theme of this season, and let me tell you, there is no way you and I will end up on the same team." She then added mockingly, "Ya hear?"

"We're halfway through our cast, and things are already heating up!" Chris said to the camera. Behind him, Leshawna had rolled up her sleeves and given her earrings to Harold. "We'll be right back after these messages!

After the commercials, a new Jeep had pulled up and the next contestants were arriving. The first one out of the Jeep was a chubby girl wearing a pink jumper and purple pants. A red bow was in her short brown hair.

"Hi everyone!" She said in a thick accent. "I'm back for my return season! My great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandfather invented return seasons. Before him, reality shows never brought back any old contestants and people quickly lost interesting…ya."

"It's Staci, who is here for her hopefully short return season," Chris announced. "Staci, go stand with the others."

"My great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great cousin invented standing with the others," Staci began, but she was cut off by the arrival of the next contestant.

"I don't want to go!" She whined, and Chris sighed. Chef walked over to the Jeep and forcefully pried her from the Jeep. "Please!" She begged. "At least tell me you invited Katie on too!"

"Hey Chris," Topher said. "Look, it's Sadie. One of the few contestants from season one to never return after eliminations _or_ get her own confessional. Did you know that? Huh? Did you?!"

"You weren't as clingy last season," Chris observed, glaring at Topher. "But you're right, it's Sadie: Bona fide, big-boned, BFFFL." He winked at the camera. "Alliteration, keeps the ratings up." Sadie was now sobbing and hugging Chris by the knees. "Sadie come on, you're embarrassing yourself on international TV…again…for like the tenth time." It finally occurred to Sadie that she was actually on television and she ran to hide behind the nearest person, which happened to be Courtney.

"Get away from me," Courtney said rudely, pushing Sadie off of her.

"S-sorry Courtney," Sadie whimpered, walking over to Leshawna.

"Don't listen to here," Leshawna said firmly. "She's just sore from the doctors trying to remove the pole that's been up her butt for so long." Sadie and a few others laughed, causing Courtney to seethe.

"If you know what's good for you you'll take that back right away!" Courtney snapped.

"Make me," Leshawna said simply, cracking her knuckles. "I've been needing a reason to slap a hoe!"

"I am not a garden tool," Courtney said defiantly, turning away from Leshawna and folding her arms over her chest. "And I refuse to participate in a petty street brawl with the likes of you." Leshawna threw herself toward Courtney, but Geoff and Harold held her back.

"Did I come at a bad time, eh?" Someone asked. They all turned to see a familiar farm-boy walking out of the Jeep, only most were surprised that he had hair and wasn't foaming from the mouth.

"Is that…Ezekiel?" Sadie gasped. "But he's like…supposed to be all grody and stuff."

"Physical therapy, eh," Ezekiel said with a nervous chuckle. "Once they got me talking right they said things would go by pretty fast." His skin was still an unhealthy shade of green, and only a little bit of his hair had grown back. He was wearing his regular clothes, fortunately clean ones, as well as his old hat.

"What a touching story of recovery," Chris said in monotone sarcasm. "Once a freak, always a freak as I like to say. Now get with the others!"

"Yes sir, eh!" Ezekiel said excitedly, standing with the others.

"Can you not stand so close to me?" Amy asked. "I'm allergic to poor and gross."

"Sorry about that," Ezekiel said, shuffling away from her. "I know girls don't like gross stuff." The female competitors that were present glared at him. "Uh, but that doesn't mean they can't…and um…yeah."

"Heh, sexist jokes," Chris said with a creepy giggle. "Alright let me think, there should have been one more person in that Jeep with you three."

"Are ya ready for me?" The next contestant asked. "Yee-haw!" She ran out of the Jeep, jumping around and waving, before stopping abruptly in front of everyone. "Hey now, where's the paparazzi? And why is it so hot out here? Are we in Texas?"

"Yep," Chris replied, "except no. We're in Tanzania!"

The girl just titled her head to the side. "Where? Oh, is that the place where those skinny girls go and get those spray tans? Sugar doesn't need fake tans to win this pageant, she'll just use her good looks and ruthless competitive edge." She winked at Topher, making him gag, before glaring at the other contestants.

"Sugar you're clearly delusional," Chris sighed. "This is the next season of Total Drama. Whatever, just go stand with the others."

"Sure thang host man!" Sugar said, trying to do the tongue clicking thing, but failing. "Oh how do those city kids do it?"

The next Jeep had arrived. The next contestant was a scrawny Indian guy with his face mostly covered by a book. Chris opened his mouth to introduce him, but he was cut off by, "Yeah, I'm Noah, I don't want to be here. They already know that."

"Hmph," Chris said, pouting. "It's Noah, and he doesn't want to be here. What else is new? Next!"

Most of the contestants were surprised at how tall the next contestant was. Samey's face lit up upon seeing her only friend, and Amy just groaned. "Ew, it's her."

Jasmine frowned. "Well that's not much for a welcome now is it? Aren't you happy to see me?"

"I'm happy to see you!" Samey said excitedly, running over to Jasmine and hugging her. "It's been forever since I've seen you."

"It's nice to see you too," Jasmine said happily. "I suppose it has been a while, but hey, at least we're here now."

"Yes, yes, so great," Chris interrupted. "Next!" They waited a few seconds, but nobody came out of the Jeep. "I said next!"

"But it's so dusty out there!" Cried the person still inside the Jeep. "And I used up all of my hand sanitizer on the plane."

"Oh quit being a baby and get out!" Snapped another person in the Jeep. There was the sound of someone being shoved and Dave fell out of the Jeep, right into the dust.

"Ah!" He screamed. "Dust!" He ran away from the Jeep and toward Chris.

"Chef, please catch the deranged lunatic before he hurts himself," Chris said. "But if he's about to hurt someone else, let him, because that will be funny." Chef rolled his eyes and went to restrain Dave.

"You better be done introducing him," huffed the next person. "EVIL deserves a much longer introduction than he does." Max climbed out of the Jeep and walked over to Chris. His eyes found Scarlett and he glared at her. "I see you've removed your ban on EVIL!"

"Don't tempt me to reverse my decision," Chris grumbled. "Okay head count. One, two…nineteen of you so far. That leaves three left." The last Jeep was now pulling up.

"Where's Bridgette?" Geoff asked worriedly.

"Gee, with only one car left I wonder where she might be," Scarlett said sarcastically. Noah smirked and nodded.

The door to the Jeep opened and out stepped a large guy wearing a hoodie. He smiled and waved silently to the rest of the cast.

"B!" Dawn said happily. "I was wondering if you would be returning this season." He nodded and stood next to her.

"Uh, is there something wrong with him?" Amy asked. "Why doesn't he talk?!" B just glared at her.

"B chooses not to talk," Dawn said simply. "It's a personal thing." She then added. "That wasn't very nice of you."

"Bite me,' Amy said bluntly.

"I sense that you would enjoy that more than I," Dawn admitted, most likely not realizing what she implied.

"Burn!" Chris said. "Anyways, next contestant!"

"Entrance appeario!" The next contestant cried, before leaping out of the Jeep and throwing a small handful of confetti in the air. Leonard ran toward the rest of the cast, but ended up tripping over his robe and landed face-first in the dirt.

"Aw yeah!" Sugar cheered. "The wizard's here, now it's a party!"

"Does he really think it's a wizard?" Trent asked. "That's…weird."

"Where's Bridgette?!" Geoff cried.

"There is literally one contestant left to introduce," Scarlett snapped. "Where do you honestly think she is?"

Geoff thought for a moment. "I don't know!"

"I'm right here Geoff!" Bridgette said, running out of the Jeep and jumping into her boyfriend's arms.

"Bridgette!" Geoff cheered, kissing her. "I had no idea where you were!"

"Unbelievable," Scarlett muttered.

Bridgette and Geoff's reunion soon turned into a full blown make out session in front of everything. It was uncomfortable for all but two parties to say the least. Three if you count the creepy satisfaction Chris was getting from seeing it. When they finally separated to breathe, Chris continued.

"Alright, that's all twenty-two of you," he said. "Time to get started. First of all, welcome to _Total Drama: Favorites vs. Not-Favorites_!"

"Seriously?" Noah said. "That's your name for it?"

"Yes, it's perfect." Chris said defensively. "Anyway, as the name suggests, the Favorites will be competing against the Not-Favorites. To qualify for this season, you must never have made a final two in your history of the games. That applies to all of you, except Geoff, but the _Ridonculous Race_ is just a lame spin-off so we won't count that. To be a Favorite you must either be well-liked by a decent chunk of the fanbase, or at the very least have been prominent in your seasons."

"Who are the Favorites?" Courtney asked. "Besides me _obviously_."

Chris rolled his eyes. "Favorites are Bridgette, Geoff, Trent, Leshawna-"

"Seriously?!" Courtney complained. "I thought she wasn't going to be on my team!"

"I never said that," Chris said. "-Jasmine, _Courtney_ , Noah, Harold, Brick, and…Amy."

"What?!" A majority of the people said in surprise.

"Do you mean Samey?" Samey asked. "I know the names sound similar but…"

"Why can't you just accept I'm always going to be the better-liked one?" Amy asked.

"Actually it's because Samey started out being extremely well-liked, mostly out of pity," Chris explained. "Then as time passed and the fans got out of their 'Pahkitew Daze' they realized that Samey's just really pathetic and completely incapable of actually being likeable."

"That's harsh dude," Geoff said. The others nodded in agreement.

"Oh it gets better," Chris promised. "Once they realized Samey was just a loser, they admired Amy for her bluntness and she now has a cult following of wannabe mean girls and sexually frustrated pre-teens."

"Fans are fans," Amy said with a shrug. "The rest of the world just hasn't caught up to my level of thinking." She walked over to her team. "Looks like this time I'll be on the winning team."

"Girl nobody even likes you," Leshawna pointed out. "Getting put on this team just means you're elimination fodder."

Amy rolled her eyes. "Pfft, whatever."

Chris continued. "The rest of you are the Not Favorites. You are highly disliked by a large amount of the fanbase and/or weren't very prominent in your seasons. Topher there's some slight bias with you."

"Way to be a sloppy host by letting personal feelings affect your hosting," Topher said, giving him a fake thumbs up.

"Shut up Topher. The Not Favorites are Staci, Ezekiel, B, Samey, Scarlett, Max, Sugar, Leonard, Sadie, Dave and Topher. Now come on, let's get started on the tour."

The contestants followed Chris off of the savannah and into the compound of the resort. A large wooden fence surrounded the complex. There was a main lobby and administration building in the center of the resort. Off to the side was a restaurant area. Off to the sides of the resort were small bungalows, five of them a bright green and the other five a dull grey.

"This is the Vumbi Resort!" Chris announced. "Your place of dwelling for the duration of the season. You'll be staying in the bungalows of your current team. Favorites are the green." The Favorites symbol was a green circle with a dark green star in the middle. "Not Favorites are the yellow." The Not Favorites symbol was a yellow circle with a darker yellow X in the middle. "Originally I had this challenge planned where you all went crazy trying to kill each other over room keys, but I decided instead we'd just have you draw room keys out of a hat. Everybody gets one."

He passed around two hats, one for each team, and each contestant took out a room key. "Hopefully none of these are co-ed," Chris chuckled. "One of the bungalows will have three people in it, but the others should just have two. And hey, that's a motive to vote someone out am I right?" The contestants just glared at him. "Yeesh, tough crowd. Anyway, go to your bungalows and unpack. I'll let you know when I need you to meet at the main lodge." The contestants all started off. "Oh, and one more thing. Since this is a safari lodge, it's not uncommon for animals to get in and wander around. I'm sure nothing dangerous will get in, but just be careful. Or don't. Either way it's good TV." He laughed as the contestants scattered to explore the resort.

Noah tried his key on the first door he found, 1A, and was surprised that it was open. He was the first one in his bungalow, meaning he picked the biggest of the two rooms and began unpacking his bags. Whoever his roommate was, he was going to make sure to set some ground rules. After a few minutes of unpacking, the door to the bungalow was thrown open.

"Woo!" Geoff cheered, running up the stairs. "Whoever my roommate is be prepared to party all season- oh." He stopped in the doorway to Noah's room. "Sup Noah?"

Noah rolled his eyes. "Look, odds are anything I tell you you're going to ignore, but as my roommate I find it only fair that you try not to bother me and that if you're girlfriend comes around you do anything up your room. And _only_ in your room."

Geoff scoffed. "Like Bridge and I would be stupid enough to do stuff in a place where we're being filmed. Besides, she's not like that. She's good."

"Right," Noah said sarcastically. "Let's just steer clear of one another and everything should be fine."

Geoff frowned, but nodded his head. "I guess that's only fair."

 **Confessional**

 **Geoff:** Man, Noah's really harsh this season. Wonder if everything's going okay with that girlfriend he got on the Race…

In Room 2A, Dawn and Jasmine were getting along peacefully, in the sense that they had barely run into one another upon arriving at the bungalow. Dawn had happily given Jasmine the bigger room (with taller ceilings). She preferred the smaller room anyway because its window faced out into the rest of the resort.

"Hello there," Dawn said happily, reaching out and petting a giraffe that was walking by. "Chris was telling the truth when he said there would be animals. Splendid!" Giraffes don't really make a lot of noise, but the giraffe leaned forward to whisper in Dawn's ear. "Really? You don't say!"

Jasmine knocked on the door frame to Dawn's room. "Excuse me," she said, "but are you talking to that giraffe?" Dawn nodded and resumed her conversation with the animal. "Like, it actually understands you and stuff?" Another nod. "That's amazing!"

The giraffe finished filling Dawn in on the latest giraffe gossip and left the window. "Thank you," Dawn replied kindly. "It's a talent I've had since I was born."

"So when you were on the show, all that aura reading was real?" Jasmine asked. Dawn nodded. "Incredible. I didn't believe any of it, but maybe you can show me sometime."

"I'm so glad I didn't get Courtney as a roommate," Harold said to Trent as he walked into Room 3A with him. "That would have been such bogus. She would have taken the bigger room and made me sleep on the floor."

"Well I _am_ taking the bigger room," Trent pointed out, setting his stuff on the bed in the bigger room. "But I'm not going to make you sleep on the floor, I promise." Harold laughed. "And don't worry about Courtney, we can just vote her out the second she gets annoying, which already happened."

Harold grinned. "Sounds like a plan. I hope Leshawna didn't get stuck with her. Leshawna can totally handle herself, but a murder charge can really ruin your chance of becoming the Fan Favorite in these sorts of games."

"Don't worry about Leshawna either," Trent reassured him. "This team's so stacked we won't be worrying about the votes until the merge. And by then, the people like Courtney and Amy will have gotten so annoying, we can just all vote them out. Then the finale will be made of people who are actually cool."

"Sounds awesome," Harold said. "Well, I'm going to go unpack. See you later!"

Leshawna entered Room 4A to find that someone else was already in there. That was cool with her, as long as her roommate wasn't somebody she hated. She climbed up the stairs to the bedroom and walked into the big one. Her roommate turned around and they both dropped their bags in shock.

"Oh hell, to the no!" Leshawna snapped. "You are _not_ my roommate. This better be some damn joke."

"You think I'm happy about it?" Amy asked, glaring at Leshawna. "I'm the prettiest one here, I should get my own room. It's bad enough my sister's going to be staying on this show, at least until she gets eliminated, but now I have to share a room with you?! Oh my gag!"

Leshawna slammed the door to Amy's room shut and stormed into her own room, which was much smaller. A giraffe passed by and stared at her for a few seconds, before hurrying down the line of windows.

 **Confessional**

 **Leshawna:** I know this bitch deserves it, but I guess it ain't a good idea to go pickin' fights the first day.

Leshawna knocked on Amy's door. "What do you want?!" Amy snapped from inside. Leshawna slowly opened the door. The cheerleader was taking clothes out of her suitcase and putting them in her closet.

"I wanted to say that I shouldn't have gotten all heated with you a few minutes ago," Leshawna admitted. "Neither of us need to be making enemies the first day."

Amy stared suspiciously at Leshawna for a few seconds. "Whatever, apology accepted I guess. Just stay out of my way and I won't have to vote you out the first chance I get."

"Sounds good to me," Leshawna said before leaving the room. _Skinny little white bitch…_

"Where are we going to sleep if there's three of us?" Courtney asked, looking at her two roommates in Room 5A. The bungalows had two bedrooms, two bathrooms, a kitchen, a little family room with a TV and a sofa, and a balcony in the back. Courtney was sharing her room with Bridgette and Brick.

"You and I could share a room?" Bridgette suggested. "Brick can have the other room." Courtney frowned at the idea of not getting her own room.

"That won't be necessary ma'am," Brick said, shaking his head. "You two can have the rooms, I'll just sleep on the couch."

"Really?" Bridgette asked. "That's really nice of you. Well then Courtney and I will share a bathroom and you can have the other one. That only seems fair."

"Much obliged," Brick said, giving a salute. "I didn't pack too much, so I'll just keep my bags in the bathroom if that's alright with you two." There were no objections so Brick went upstairs.

"He seems nice," Bridgette offered.

Courtney rolled her eyes. "Yeah, he's a real gentleman.

 **Confessional**

 **Courtney:** I'm not buying into Brick's nice guy act. If he's a serious supporter of the military, then he probably knows how to be ruthless and has a take no prisoner's attitude. Like me, only less perfect. He'll be useful in challenges I'm sure.

Over on the other side of the resort, the two residents of Room 1B were pleased to have gotten one another as roommates.

"I love, love, love, love, love your jumper!" Sadie squealed, hugging Staci randomly. "It's pink and I love the color pink!"

"Same!" Staci said excitedly, returning the hug. "My great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandmother Rose invented the color pink. Before then, the world was left without pink."

"No. Way." Sadie said in shock. "That's like, really bad. And like, totally not okay. I am so happy your whatever many great grandmother was alive. Pink is like, my life, almost. Pink and Katie."

Staci nodded. "It's sad, because my family doesn't get the credit they so deserve. That's why I go around telling everybody facts about my family so they get appreciated."

"Well I like, so appreciate your family now," Sadie promised. "What else did they do?"

"I'm glad you asked," Staci said with a smile.

Dave was whistling a merry tune and unpacking his _clean_ luggage in Room 2B, when the door opened. He sighed. His roommate was here. Dave didn't particularly like anybody on his team, but there were definitely worse options for roommates than some people. Best case scenario, he got Samey who was at the very least hygienic. Worst case scenario, he got Sugar.

It ended up being neither when his roommate decided to introduce himself with an _Apperio_ spell. Leonard seemed to be under the impression that he and Dave were sharing a room instead of them both taking separate ones.

"Seriously, there's an empty room down the hall," Dave said. "Just go be in the that one."

"We are Party Members now," Leonard said, waggling his finger. "We must bond and train together! That extra room can be our dungeon or our convoy for any artifacts we find during the game."

Dave sighed. "Whatever, but I demand you keep at least five feet away from me at all times."

"Hello?" Samey called out as she opened the door of Room 3B. "Is anybody there?" Samey was already dreading being on the team of Not Favorites, and she wasn't exactly excited to meet her roommate. Chris's words still stung, even if they were apparently true.

The bigger of the two rooms was empty, so Samey set her bags on the bed and went to see who was in the smaller room. Two suitcases had been opened and the clothes and items had been neatly packed away into the dresser and closet. A small laptop was sitting on the desk.

"What are you doing in here?!" Samey jumped and spun around to see Scarlett standing in the doorway. The evil genius had just exited the bathroom to find Samey in her room. "I gave you the larger of the two rooms as a formality, so unless you feel the need to take both, get out."

"S-sorry," Samey stuttered. "I just didn't know who my roommate was. Please don't hurt me." Scarlett continued to glare at her as she left the room.

"For future notice, please stay out of my room," Scarlett said simply. "Do that and I see no reason why we won't get along. Break that one rule and you won't like what happens to you. Got it?!"

"Yes," Samey squeaked, before running to her room and shutting the door. Scarlett smirked and went to sort out her things.

 **Confessional**

 **Scarlett:** I'm relieved to have gotten Samey, or Sammy since that's her real name, for my roommate. Could you imagine what would happen if Max had been my roommate? There would go my chance for parole. No, Samey will be a decent roommate, I'm sure of it.

 **Samey:** So I'm back on the show with Amy again…great…but at least we're not on the same team. My roommate is Scarlett, which is totally terrifying, but at least she doesn't want to murder me…yet. I should just look on the bright side of things, right?

"Well little man, looks like you got the best room in the whole dang resort," Sugar said gleefully, putting her arm around Max and nearly choking him. She had entered Room 4B to find the tiny gnome man was her roommate. "Sugar's gonna be the best roommate you've ever had."

"Can't...take…EVIL breaths," Max gasped. Sugar released him and pranced upstairs. He followed her and watched as she took his bags out of the largest room and threw them out into the hall.

"A pageant queen needs her beauty rest," Sugar explained.

Max ran to the smaller room and put his bags in. This room was smaller and had one less window. "Hm…perhaps this will be a great spot for my new EVIL lair!" He rubbed his hands together mischievously. "And with that oaf as my newest minion, I'll be undefeatable! AHAHAHAHAHA!"

"Keep it down will ya?!" Sugar snapped from her room, throwing a shoe across the hall and hitting Max in the back of the head.

Room 5B was the last bungalow in the resort. Topher had gotten there first, eager to criticize Chris for his choice in accommodations. Instead he was surprised that the bungalows were actually nice. He took the largest room and chilled on the couch, waiting for his roommates to show up.

The first one was B, who gave a small wave to Topher. Ezekiel followed quickly, following B upstairs to check out the rooms.

"Um, is it cool if I take the bed?" Ezekiel asked. "My therapist says I need to get adjusted to doing human activities, like sleeping in beds." B nodded in understanding and set his luggage in the corner. He'd have to go see Topher about his sleeping arrangement.

"You want to sleep in my bed?" Topher guessed upon seeing B's gestures. "Look man, I totally get that, I mean who wouldn't want to sleep in the same bed as this?" B face palmed as Topher gestured to himself. "But the Topher is strictly off limits until he becomes a host." B sighed and pulled Topher into his room and gestured to the floor. "Oh…you want to sleep on the floor in my room?" B nodded. "Well yeah, sure. That's a bit creepy, but anything for a fan." B just rolled his eyes as Topher went back downstairs.

After everyone was situated, Chris's voice came over the intercom and asked that they all come to the main lodge for lunch. The contestants all met up and found a fancy buffet had been set up for them. They ate with their teams and made small-talk.

"Do your sleeping conditions suit you my love?" Harold asked, scooting closer to Leshawna. Leshawna rolled her eyes, but smiled.

"They could be better," she side-glared Amy, who side-glared back, "but they're better than they've been in other seasons."

"Chris is certainly spending a lot of money this season," Courtney mused. "You should all thank me because my lawyers probably have something to do with it." Nobody thanked her.

Bridgette and Geoff were passionately making out at the far end of the table, much to the disgust of most of the people that witnessed it.

"Did they learn anything from Action?" Trent joked. The others laughed and some of them shook their heads when they saw Bridgette and Geoff, not that the two of them noticed.

Dawn held Jasmine's hand in hers and closed her eyes. "Hm…your aura is a soft pink. You're thinking of somebody you love. Is it that Shawn boy?"

Jasmine's cheeks flushed. "Yeah, I'm a little sad he didn't get picked to come back, even if he did win last time."

"I'm sure Shawn's cheering for you at home," Dawn said, patting Jasmine's hand. "I'm happy to be on the same team as one of my friends for Revenge of the Island, and I'm a bit sad that B is on the other team. But such is fate."

Brick looked over at Noah, who wasn't eating and was instead flipping through his book. "You need to keep your strength up soldier. We can't afford to lose this challenge on account of an empty stomach."

Noah looked over at him. "Not hungry, sorry. And I doubt one empty stomach is going to lose us this challenge."

Brick frowned. "You should still eat something."

"Meh, maybe later."

"We never get stuff like this back on the farm," Sugar said, shoveling shrimp and cocktail sauce into her mouth. "I love these little ocean worms!"

"Shrimp are not EVIL enough for my taste," Max said. "Ooh, pudding!"

Dave slumped his head against the table. To his left was Leonard, who was trying to transfigure his glass of orange juice into a phoenix to be his companion animal. On his right was Scarlett, who was cutting up pieces of ham and eating like a normal person…surprisingly. "Hey," he said. Scarlett ignored him. "Okay then."

Scarlett was more interested in the person on her right and across from her. Staci was chatting about her relatives to Sadie and Samey, who seemed to be listening to her mostly out of politeness instead of actual interest.

"My great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandfather Horace invented buffets," Staci said happily. "Before then, people had no concept of portion control."

Within an hour of being Staci's roommate, Sadie realized that Staci was probably not being truthful about most of the things she was saying.

 **Confessional**

 **Sadie:** I feel _so_ bad for people like Staci who have no friends. She probably tells all those lies because she wants people to think she's, like, interesting. Oh my gosh, I should so like, be her friend so she stops lying! OMG that's such a good idea. Katie I hope you're like, proud of me!

 **Scarlett:** What is it with this show just _handing_ me morons to take advantage of. I have a whole team of them this season! And if you think for one second I'm not going to try and take advantage of every single one of them, then you should just stop watching.

"Hey man, watch this," Topher said, elbowing Ezekiel and showing him the clump of mashed potatoes that was resting on the handle of his spoon. "These potatoes are going to go all over Scarlett's face."

"Won't that make her mad?" Zeke asked.

"Yeah, it'll cause _drama_!" Topher said excitedly. "Besides, Scarlett's crazy anyway."

"I'm right here," Scarlett said with an eye roll. "And if you hit me with potatoes I'll…" Her voice trailed off as she realized she couldn't cause Topher any bodily harm without violating the terms of her parole. "Never mind."

"I'll take that as a go," Topher laughed, slamming his fist down on the other end of the spoon and sending the potatoes flying. The clump of food was intercepted by a saltine cracker and landed harmlessly on Sugar's plate. The farm girl picked up the cracker and ate it. Topher, Ezekiel, and Scarlett turned to see the source of the cracker. B had constructed a catapult from several pieces of silverware, a soup bowl, a plate, and a napkin.

"Impressive," Scarlett noted, switching spots with Samey to get a better look at the catapult. "Although for maximum efficiency I recommend tightening the napkin, removing the knife, and firing at this angle. Voila!" A packet of crackers flew across the table and hit Topher in the face. B and Scarlett laughed at the result.

A few minutes later, Chris entered the dining area with Chef. "I hope you all got settled in and ate something," the host said. "Because in just a few short minutes, we'll be starting our first challenge!"

 ** _Team Favorites:_** _Amy, Brick, Bridgette, Courtney, Dawn, Geoff, Harold, Jasmine, Leshawna, Noah, Trent_

 ** _Team Not Favorites:_** _B, Dave, Ezekiel, Leonard, Max, Sadie, Samey, Scarlett, Staci, Sugar, Topher_

 ** _Eliminated:_** _None_


	2. E2: The Title Could Be Shorter Part 2

**Hey worldwide web,**

 **Heh…it's been…what, almost two years? A year and a half? Guess I was busier than I thought…**

 **So thanks everyone for the feedback on the first chapter! A few of you have some questions/concerns about the team placings, and that's okay, I'll clear them up. Regarding Samey and Amy's placements: I** _ **know**_ **Samey is preferred by a lot of people, but there are definitely those that like Amy more, because they think she's more interesting. I love both of them and I chose their team placings as a plot device. Personal bias was kept out of this, trust me. Actually if I didn't need this plot, they'd probably both be on the Not Favorites since they weren't around very much in their season.**

 **Lastly, I'll quickly reply to the guest reviews since I can't PM them privately (even though they're like over a year old and the likelihood of the reviewers seeing them is low.**

 **bluehuggy0nine: I like a lot of those characters too :D Sorry some of them couldn't fit in the story, and hey, glad you're liking it so far!**

 **what: Now, now, there's no need to be rude. I actually like Samey over Amy, and any other explanation for the twins' team placement was answered above. Thanks for the review!**

 **Now onto the story~**

 **Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

* * *

"In just a few short minutes, we'll be starting our first challenge!" Chris announced while the contestants were still eating. They all looked up at him in surprise. "Don't worry, since you've just eaten this won't be a very physically demanding challenge." The contestants cheered. "It'll be a _mentally_ demanding challenge!" Most of them groaned.

"Excellent," Scarlett said, wiping her mouth softly with a napkin. "With the combined brainpower and nerd-culture knowledge of our team, we'll likely dominate in any trivia based challenge."

Chris smirked. "Hold on a second Scarlett, I never once said anything about this being a trivia challenge. If you'd follow me outside, please."

They followed Chris out of the dining room and out toward an open pavilion in the resort. A large divider split the area into two halves. "As you have probably figured out, African resorts are widely acclaimed for their safari tours. No safari is complete without a safari vehicle. So today, your challenge is to design and build a safari vehicle that can hopefully hold all eleven members of your team. You may use any spare junk that you can find lying around the resort, but don't take something that clearly belongs to someone else. Stealing is a no-no. Got it evil genius and pathetic villain wannabe?" Scarlett rolled her eyes and Max pouted.

"So we all have to fit on it?" Leshawna clarified.

"That's correct," Chris answered. "Which might make things tough for the team that has the…ahem…bigger people on it." He shot a glance at the Not Favorites and received several glares back. "Okay, you'll put them together here and we've put up this divider so nobody sees each other's vehicles. Now go!"

Each side of the pavilion had a dry erase board, three markers, and an eraser. Courtney made a move to grab a marker, but Harold beat her to it. "What are you doing?!" Courtney asked.

"I'm being the leader of this challenge Courtney," Harold replied. "I know everything there is to know about safari vehicles from my summer at Safari Steve's Safari Camp."

"There's a camp in Canada dedicated to learning about safaris?" Courtney scoffed. "Yeah right. What do you know about being a leader? _I_ am a CIT. I should be leader."

"I vote we have Harold do it," Leshawna said. "All in agreement?" Geoff, Trent, Dawn, and Jasmine raised their hands. Courtney turned to Bridgette, who gave her a sympathetic look before also raising her hand.

"Fine, whatever," Courtney grumbled. "But it's only fair that we have a vice leader to take over when Harold, inevitably, screws up."

"Oh my gag who cares about a leader!" Amy interrupted. "I'm going to go take care of something, try not to lose us the challenge while I'm gone." She stormed off, leaving most her team appalled.

"She can't just abandon the team like that," Courtney complained. "Storming off is _my_ thing!"

Leshawna rolled her eyes. "I'll go keep an eye on her. Maybe I'll bring us back something we can use too." She went to go find Amy.

Harold was already making a list on the whiteboard. "So we'll need an engine, some tires, a steering wheel, something big we can all fit in for the tires, and some fuel. Any questions?" There were none.

"Way to go team!" Brick said enthusiastically. "We can stick it out even in the toughest of arguments."

"Brick go do something useful," Courtney ordered, helping Harold draw the diagram.

"Yes ma'am!" Brick said, giving a salute before walking away. Dawn and Jasmine went off in the opposite direction, but quickly split their paths to go other ways. Bridgette and Geoff, while holding hands, went to go search for wheels. Trent went by himself to look for anything useful he could find, leaving Noah by himself with Courtney and Harold.

"Don't just sit there," Courtney said to Noah. "Do something!"

"Relax Courtney," Harold said to her. "Noah can stay here and help us plan, gosh!"

Noah groaned. "Fine, what do you need?"

Harold shrugged. "Not sure, maybe just someone to look over the plans. Courtney's making a list of…names?"

"I'm writing down the names of everyone on our team and writing down who's doing the most work," Courtney explained. "That way if we lose, which we won't, we'll know who to vote for."

Noah and Harold exchanged glances, but Noah rolled his eyes and watched Harold draw out his plan. They wouldn't really know what it was going to look like until after the others brought back the supplies, but they knew how big it would have to be.

On the other side of the divider, Scarlett was writing equations and diagrams on the whiteboard. As the only one with engineering expertise _and_ a willingness to talk, she quickly took over as leader for the challenge. B resigned to helping her with calculations and the overall building process.

"If we can assume our vehicle needs to hold our entire team of eleven, we'll need a large enough surface area but an equally large support to keep the vehicle from falling apart in the middle of use," Scarlett mused. She turned around to look at the rest of her team. "Well don't just stand there, go get some supplies."

 **Confessional**

 **Scarlett:** Back on Pahkitew Island, there weren't very many building challenges. Hopefully this first challenge allows my team to understand that even if they have some…well…reservations about me as a teammate, I'm an asset.

The other Not Favorites who weren't working on the planning rushed off to find supplies. Most of the safari resort was for recreation, but there was a decent chunk of it dedicated to staff supplies and various junk that wasn't being used.

Bridgette and Geoff had stumbled upon a stack of metal sheets that would have been perfect to arrange in a box shape for their vehicle. So they did the obvious thing and began to make out on top of them. At least with their presence would deter other contestants from taking the metal for themselves.

"Babe," Bridgette said, stopping the make-out session, "maybe we should actually try and search for some stuff. Or at least bring these metal sheets back to Courtney."

"Aw, but I missed my Bridgey-Bear last night," Geoff whined. "I'm sure Courtney will be fine."

"I don't know…" Bridgette's voice trailed off as she saw Geoff's pleading eyes. "Oh…how can I say no to that face?" Geoff grinned as he and Bridgette began to make out again. As usually, they got really into it and ended up rolling off of the metal sheets.

'Ow!" Geoff cried as he landed on something hard. Bridgette was on his chest. "Are you okay babe?"

"Yeah I'm fine," Bridgette said, getting up. "What about you?"

"I think I- woah, no way," Geoff said as he stood up. He had landed on a perfectly-sized steering wheel. It had a dent in it due to being landed on, but otherwise it seemed to work fine. "See babe, this never would have happened if we hadn't kept making out."

Bridgette looked down at the steering wheel. "Well, I guess that makes sense." She picked up the wheel. "Come on, let's get this to Courtney and _then_ we can go back to making out. Maybe then we'll find even more stuff!"

"Alright!" Geoff cheered as he followed his girlfriend back to Courtney.

Elsewhere, Max and Sugar had ended up searching for supplies together.

"I've never built a go-kart before," Sugar remarked. "Wadda ya think we're gonna need-"

"Hush simpleton," Max hissed. Sugar's eyes narrowed and Max took a couple of steps back. "Building go-karts isn't quite…oh…EVIL enough. No, no, we need to do something truly diabolical. We need…" He leaned closer to Sugar, but then recoiled upon smelling her breath. "We need to steal!"

"Steal?" Sugar gasped. "That's the best idea I've ever heard! Well, after the idea to put me on TV of course. What are we goin' to steal?"

"I'm not sure," Max admitted as they continued to walk around. "Quick, hide!" He jumped behind a supply shed and Sugar followed him. A couple interns walked past, unaware of the duo's presence. "Good, now that the guards are gone, we can get into this shed."

"What guards?" Sugar asked. "What's in this shed?"

"Be quiet, you're interrupting my EVIL genius," Max shushed. He examined the shed, giving it a kick. "Interesting. This is a wooden shed." He pressed his ear to the wood. "Now how do we get inside?"

"Why don't we just open the front door?" Sugar suggested, reaching for the handle.

"NO!" Max screamed quickly swatting Sugar's hand away. The country girl growled menacingly. "If we were to enter through the front door we'd be caught immediately. We'll have to find a much more EVIL approach." Sugar just rolled her eyes.

Samey had been searching for supplies on her own for most of the challenge, until she noticed Topher walking past her.

 **Confessional**

 **Samey:** Last time I was on Total Drama, I didn't really get to make any friends except for Jasmine, and now she's on the other team. But so is Amy…that means I need to do my best to make new friends and actually get really far!

"Uh…Topher?" Samey said, walking up to the Chris fan.

"Amy!" Topher greeted. "Here to take out a member of the other team? How evil of you, but it's not going to work. As part of me winning this game and replacing Chris, I won't be letting anyone get in my way."

"Um, that's great," Samey replied awkwardly. "But uh, I'm-"

"That's Samey," Amy said, pushing her sister down and walking past Topher. "Ugh, I can't believe you confused me for her, gawd."

"Amy," Samey said, growling a little and standing up. "You…you can't just do that to me!" Topher raised an eyebrow and Amy stopped walking to turn and look at her sister.

"Of course I can," Amy said simply. "In fact, I just did." With that, she resumed her originally course, quickly ducking behind a pile of garbage to listen to the conversation.

"She is literally the worst," Samey grumbled, stomping her foot. She turned to look at Topher, who had looked away to check himself out in the reflection of a puddle. "Have you found anything yet?"

"I've found you, gorgeous," Topher winked at the puddle and clicked his tongue.

"Um, what?"

"Sorry did you say something?" Topher turned away from the puddle to look at Samey. "Find anything?"

"No, not yet," Samey sighed.

Amy rolled her eyes from behind the pile of garbage. Then she got an idea. "Probably because she's pathetic!"

Samey looked around. "Amy? Where are you?" Amy giggled from behind the garbage.

 **Confessional**

 **Amy:** I don't have to do any work during this challenge now. I can just follow Samey around and when she finds something I'll take it. That way I'm not only sabotaging her but I'm also making myself look even better than I already look!

"Oh Samey, you're not pathetic," Topher reassured with a comforting pat on Samey's shoulder. "Well I mean, you kind of are, but that's okay."

"Excuse me?" Samey said, raising an eyebrow. "I didn't say that!"

Topher scratched the back of his head. "It sure sounded like you," he pointed out.

"Samey is like, _so_ totally lame," Amy shouted, still behind the pile of garbage.

Samey glanced at Topher, who just shrugged. "Well I mean, you cheated kind of which was pretty lame," he remarked.

"But _Amy_ is the one saying those things!" Samey exclaimed. "She's right over there!" She pointed off toward the garbage pile.

"That's just a pile of garbage," Topher commented. "Maybe you should stay out of the sun. Come on, let's go see if there's a place with some supplies and air-conditioning." Samey just groaned as Topher dragged her off toward one of the buildings.

"This is so easy it almost isn't any fun," Amy said with a pout as she watched Topher and Samey walk away. She then smirked. "Almost." A honey badger popped out of the garbage pile and hissed at Amy. "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"Did you hear something?" Harold asked Noah and Courtney as he continued to draw up plans for the vehicle. The others shrugged. Harold resumed drawing his plans.

"This would look, like, so totally good wouldn't it?" Sadie asked Staci as she held up a bright pink towel she had found on the ground. "I love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love pink!"

"Yeah, and it's a good thing we found a towel so our vehicle will stay dry," Staci said. "My great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandfather invented staying dry. Before then, everything that got wet had to stay that way forever."

"Yeah," Sadie said, glancing awkwardly at the camera. "That's…great." She put the towel over her shoulder and kept on walking. "So Staci, what's your favorite movie?"

"Oh I don't have one," Staci replied. "But you know who invented movies? My great-great-great-great-great -great-great-great-great-great-great-"

"Staci I don't really, like, think anybody you're related to invented, like, movies," Sadie admitted. "That's like, not possible."

Staci gasped and gave Sadie an offended look. "How could you say something like that?! That's so mean. And I should know, being mean was invented by my great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandmother Beatrice. And before then, everyone was nice."

 **Confessional**

 **Sadie:** Yeah…so like, I thought confronting Staci about her lying would help, but it like, didn't. So maybe I should try, like, something else.

"You know you are like, so right," Sadie said, putting her hand on Staci's shoulders. "I'm so like, sorry Staci. I guess I'm just a little jealous because nobody I'm related to is famous."

 **Confessional**

 **Sadie:** My aunt's actually the lead actress on the Canadian soap-opera _She Made Maple What?_ Hi Auntie Kay!

"Well, I guess that makes sense," Staci said. "I mean there's a lot to be jealous of, ya. You know who invented jealousy? My great-great-great-great-great-"

"Staci," Sadie interrupted, "how about like, just so I don't get jealous again, we talk about something else? I wouldn't want to, like, be mean again."

Staci shrugged. "Okay, I guess if that's what you need to feel better about yourself then ya, we can talk about something else."

"Thanks, like, _so_ much Staci," Sadie squealed, before glancing awkwardly at the camera when Staci wasn't looking.

"So what else should we be looking for?" Staci asked.

"I'm not sure," Sadie admitted. "How about…um…" The two girls stood around, thinking. Sadie gasped. "I know! We need mirrors. That way whoever's driving can see behind them, unless they have a blind spot." Sadie sniffled. "Katie has a really big blind spot whenever she drives," she whimpered. "It's how she drove my mom's car into a Snack Shack that one summer…I'm sorry, I shouldn't be crying, I just miss her so much!"

Sadie fell to her knees and began to sob uncontrollably. Staci patted her back. "Oh, it's okay. Katie's in a good place right now, ya."

 **Confessional**

 **Staci:** Ya, I don't know who Katie is, I think it's Sadie's dog, but I so feel for Sadie right now. I know just what it's like to lose someone close to you. Most of my relatives have passed away, ya.

Trent huffed and pulled a tire out from underneath a pile of garbage. He set it next to the other three identical ones he had found earlier. "Alright," he said to himself. "Four tires, that should be enough. I better get these back to Courtney and-"

"Come on soldier!" A voice bellowed, making Trent jump. He turned to see Brick walking toward him.

"Brick what the hell?" Trent asked.

"We are a _team_ soldier," Brick explained. "We need to be working together. One person slacking off is a problem for the whole group."

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about you just standing around when those tires need to be moved!" Brick attempted to pick up all four of the tires but had to set two of them down. "Alright, you grab the other two and let's move out! Don't worry, I won't tell the others about your daydreaming, you just need a little motivation is all."

"But I was-"

"No need for excuses soldier," Brick said with a grin. "I'll show you what it means to be a team player."

"I still have no idea what's happening," Trent grumbled to himself as they carried the tires back to the others.

Meanwhile, Dawn was combing through another section of the resort, picking up whatever trash she knew couldn't be recycled and putting it in a trash bag. Her bag had gotten pretty heavy and she could no longer carry it over her shoulder, opting instead to just drag it on the ground behind her.

She rounded a corner and came across Jasmine examining some more trash. Her teammate looked over and her and whistled at the large bag. "Whatcha got there?" Jasmine asked, walking over to Dawn. "Some parts for the vehicle?"

"Oh, this is just some trash I was picking up," Dawn explained with a giggle. "These poor African creatures don't deserve to be anymore affected by Chris and his show then they already have been."

"Oh I get it," Jasmine said with a nod. "You're one of those hippie types who wants to save the planet. Far out!" Dawn just giggled again. "Hey, would you like to look for stuff with me?"

"Oh certainly," Dawn said with a nod, walking with Jasmine. "I can tell you're nervous about making friends since Sammy is on the other team."

"Uh," Jasmine gave Dawn a strange look, "what do you mean?"

"I can read it in your aura," Dawn said cheerfully, stopping to pick up a plastic bottle. She seemed to still be struggling to drag it along so Jasmine picked it up for her. "Thank you!"

"Aura," Jasmine said after a little bit, "you can see mine?"

"Oh yes," Dawn replied, "quite clearly as well. You don't like to keep secrets, making it quite easy to read the poetry of your soul."

"Thanks…" Jasmine said awkwardly as they continued to look for things.

 **Confessional**

 **Jasmine:** So, Dawn's a bit…strange, but she seems nice. And who am I to judge, my boyfriend believes in zombies!

"And then, after doing a Stamina check, I managed to leap across the Gorge of Never Ending Sorrows!" Leonard exclaimed to Dave as the two walked around the resort. "But nothing could have prepared me for what was waiting on the other side…"

"Some duct tape?" Dave said, walking toward a pile of supplies.

"No!" Leonard huffed. "The Seven-Eyed-Toad of Makanura. Only the most powerful Legend Beast in all of-"

"No I mean I found some duct tape," Dave said, holding up the roll of shiny, silver tape. "Duct tape can be used for everything!"

"Like magic?" Leonard asked excitedly.

"Uh…sure," Dave sighed. "Yes, it's can be used for magic. Specifically a..uh…spell to make a safari vehicle!"

Leonard gasped. "That's exactly what we need! How convenient."

"Right?" Dave said dryly, rolling his eyes when Leonard wasn't looking. "Hey, does your robe have pockets?"

"This _Tunic of Everlasting Life_ ," Leonard said, gesturing to his outfit, "is full of bottomless pockets perfect for holding tomes, tokens, trinkets, amulets, potions, staffs-"

"Great," Dave interrupted, "start putting that stuff in them." He gestured to a pile of trash.

"But…isn't that just garbage?" Leonard asked, raising an eyebrow.

Dave glanced around. "Uh…no! It may _appear_ to be ordinary garbage, but it's secretly the pieces used in the ancient art of Trash Guardian…Making. A Trash Guardian would definitely help us win right?"

"Psh," Leonard scoffed, "of course it would. Everyone knows Trash Guardians have a base Resistance of 60 to make up for their low Speed and Defense. We'd be impervious to any magic the team throws at us!" He began to stuff trash into his pockets. Dave just smirked behind him.

 **Confessional**

 **Dave:** Yeah, so I'm kind of a nerd I guess…whatever. I know enough stuff to fool Leonard into doing all the dirty work! Well, I guess I can have him do the clean work too, but first the dirty work.

"So what are you going to need, eh?" Ezekiel asked B. B and Scarlett had drawn up plans for the safari vehicle and were currently putting together some parts that the others had dropped up.

"Shouldn't you be out searching?" Scarlett asked, unimpressed.

"Well, yeah," Ezekiel said, rubbing the back of his neck, "but I don't know what to look for, yo. If you guys have any ideas I'd be glad to help, eh."

B tapped his chin. He then pointed to a part of the plan.

"Oh," Ezekiel said, getting a closer look, "you want me to find something to use as a seat?" B nodded. "Alright, eh, I can probably do that." B gave him a thumbs up as he left.

"You handed that simpleton quite well," Scarlett remarked after Ezekiel left. B raised an eyebrow at her. "What? I think I've properly assessed his mental capabilities. Calling him a simpleton is generous." B just shook his head and wagged his finger. Scarlett's eyebrow twitched. "Well, it doesn't matter what you think. I'm allowed my opinion. My _correct_ opinion." B just chuckled. Silently of course.

"Uh…are you sure about this?" Sugar asked as she watched Max pace around the shed. He was wearing a gas mask and had a paper cone taped to the front of his face.

"Of course I'm sure," Max boasted. "The rhinoceros is one of the most EVIL beings known to man. By channeling it's EVIL spirit, I should be able to break down this door no problem." He took a few steps back and charged at the door, slamming into it and falling back into the dirt. "It…didn't work," he said, spitting out some of the sand in his mouth.

"Here," Sugar said, picking Max up, "let me use you like a bowlin' ball and break down this here door."

"Have, uh, been bowling before?" Max gulped.

"No," Sugar said, "but back on the farm, we potbellied pigs and logs and Mama says it's the same type of thing."

"I think I have some reservations about this-PLAAAAAAAAAAAN!" Max screamed as Sugar threw him into the door. He broke through it, leaving a large gap for her to step through.

"Yee-haw!" Sugar cheered, looking around the shed. "Hey look at that!" She pointed to a pitchfork. "We have one of those back on the farm."

Max just groaned from his spot on the floor. He looked up and noticed something in the back. "Is that…" he walked over to two objects covered by a tarp. He pulled the tarp away and gasped. "It is! Motor bikes! Quick minion, grab these!"

"Sure thang," Sugar said, picking up one of the bikes and helping Max with the other. "I sure hope Chris doesn't get mad about us stealing."

"But if he does, we'll be truly EVIL!" Max cackled.

Amy, after having escaped the honey badger, followed Topher and Samey around, making sure to fool Topher into thinking it was Samey talking whenever she could.

"Amy's literally following us," Samey said, pointing off to some bushes Amy had crawled into. Topher just blinked, not seeing anything. "Ugh!"

"Samey wait up!" Topher said, jogging after her. "You need me to protect you, I have to look like a protagonist."

Amy just laughed as she exited the bushes. "Oh it's almost too easy."

"Gurl, just what do you think you're doin'?" A voice asked. Amy turned to see Leshawna walking toward her, snapping her fingers. "I sure hope you ain't tryna throw this challenge to get one of us sent home!"

"Oh my gag," Amy said, rolling her eyes. "I'm like, not even trying to lose. I'm trying to make sure Samey goes home first. Duh."

Leshawna put her hands on her hips. "So you're more worried about sabotage than working with your team? Girl, you got issues."

Amy shrugged. "At least I'm pretty," she said. "It doesn't look like you've found anything either."

"I just dropped my stuff back off with Courtney and Harold," Leshawna shot back. "They told me to go looking for you. And now that I've found you, I'm going to make sure you start contributin' to this team or I'm sending your ass home. Understand?"

"Whatever," Amy scoffed, turning to walk away. "Try not to get your weave- woah!" She cried out as she tripped over something large in front of her. "Ugh, what is that?!"

"It's an engine," Leshawna said, coming over to look at it. "And it looks like it's in good shape. Come on, help me carry it back to the others."

Amy looked over her shoulder and couldn't see Samey. "Fine," she sighed, "but only because Samey isn't around." She grabbed one side of the engine and helped lift it. The two girls began to slowly walk back to their team.

"I can't believe we haven't found anything useful yet," Jasmine complained as she and Dawn continued to search through the resort area. "I mean, I know this is a challenge, but I would have hoped to at least find some spare tires or something that would actually be used to make a vehicle."

"Worry not," Dawn said, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath, "I'm sure Mother Earth has plans for us. Plans that involve us winning this challenge." The two girls waited for a few seconds, but nothing happened. Dawn frowned. "Hm…maybe we should try and meet Mother Earth halfway."

"How do we do that?" Jasmine asked, deciding to just sort of go along with it.

"By making our goal benefit her," Dawn explained. "If we want her to help us find parts of the vehicle, we should make it pedal-powered so it doesn't hurt her!" Jasmine just blinked.

"Uh," she chuckled, "that's…an interesting idea. I mean, you'd need a lot of pedals, but I guess we could try it. So would that make Mother Earth help us?"

"We'll just have to wait and see," Dawn said with a smile. "She works in such mysterious ways." A bird landed on Dawn's shoulder and chirped something into her ear. "Really?" Dawn said, her eyes widening. "Thank you so much, blessed one." The bird flew away.

"Did you just…" Jasmine began, but stop. "Er, what did the bird say?"

"He knows where we can get some supplies," Dawn said excitedly, clapping her hands together. She took one of Jasmine's hands. "Come on!"

"Woah!" Jasmine said, surprised by the force Dawn used to pull her off in the direction of the supplies. "Slow down!"

Back at the pavilion, Courtney was running through all the supplies that had been brought to her so far. "So we have four tires, a steering wheel, a lot of garbage, and…Brick what is _that_?"

"It's a canoe," the cadet said excitedly, setting down the large boat in the center of the Favorites' side of the pavilion. "It has a hole in the bottom so they threw it out, but I figured we could probably use it, right?"

"That's…actually useful," Courtney remarked. "I mean, you could have done better, but I won't cite you for contributing nothing in this challenge." Brick gave her a salute and went out to find anything else he could use.

"Have you actually been citing people for that?" Noah droned, looking up from the plans.

"Well, no," Courtney said awkwardly, "but I _have_ been tracking who brings what. Which reminds me, aside from you who's been here assisting, we have four team members who haven't come back with anything yet."

"I don't really care who they are," Noah admitted, "but I'm guessing you'll tell me anyway?"

"Of course," Courtney replied. "Jasmine, Dawn, Amy, and Leshawna have yet to return. I don't really know the first two, or Amy for that matter, but Leshawna said she'd be keeping an eye on her. And while I'm not a huge fan of Leshawna, I can't write her up for something like that. The point still remains that they have yet to bring anything back of value-"

"We brought back an engine, _gawd_ ," Amy said, walking into the pavilion with Leshawna. They set the engine down on the ground. "So like, quit your bitching already." Courtney just stared at Amy in disbelief. Leshawna whistled.

 **Confessional**

 **Leshawna:** I may not like that little white bitch, but _dayum_ do I respect someone who can tell Courtney off. But uh…she's so going home now.

"You can't just talk to me like that," Courtney said. "I'm one of the co-leaders of this challenge. Talking to me like-"

"More importantly," Noah interrupted, rolling his eyes, "does the engine actually work?"

"I don't fucking know," Amy said, waving it off, "but you're like welcome anyway. Now if you're done being super boring, I have to go make sure Samey still sucks. I mean, she still does obviously, but I better make sure." With that, she left.

"She is literally the worst," Courtney huffed, "thinking she can talk to me like that. Who does she think she is?!"

"Still more important things to worry about," Noah said flatly. "Like how do we get this engine to work? What sort of fuel do we use to power it?"

"I could look for some gas tanks," Trent offered. He had been taking a few minutes to get out of the sun as he had some mild sunburn starting on the back of his neck.

"We have something for that," Dawn said, appearing out of nowhere and making everyone jump. Jasmine came walking into the pavilion as well. She set down Dawn's bag of garbage while Dawn held up a pedal. "We found these pedals in a dumpster and grabbed as many as we could. If we all pedaled it at once, we'd be able to start the engine, right?"

"Do engines work that way?" Trent asked, looking at Harold, who looked at Courtney, who looked at Noah, who just shrugged.

"I'm sure we can figure it out," Harold said, "just give me a second. Go get the others and tell them to help us start building." The others went out to find their teammates.

"So," Scarlett said, looking over the motor bikes suspiciously, "you just happened to find these in the trash?" Max and Sugar nodded vehemently. "In perfectly good condition?" More nodding. "And…you just took them?"

"Enough with the questions former minion," Max hissed. Scarlett's eye twitched. "We found you exactly what you need. Now do what you do best, and make us win!"

"What exactly am I supposed to do with two motor bikes?" Scarlett asked, standing up to tower over Max. He took a few steps back.

"We have found the Coil of Silvery Binding," Leonard said excitedly, holding up the roll of duct tape.

"You just made that name up on the way here," Dave deadpanned, taking the tape from Leonard and tossing it to Scarlett. B caught it first, however, and began to get to work taping the two motor bikes together.

"And now what?" Scarlett asked, rolling her eyes. "We still wouldn't be able to fit all of our team members onto it."

"Would the mirrors we found help?" Sadie asked, holding up to handheld mirrors.

"No," Scarlett said flatly. "What we'd need are seats."

There was a grunt as Topher and Samey walked in, dragging along a large, torn up sofa. B and Sugar went to go help them lift it into the pavilion.

"Where'd you find that?" Scarlett asked skeptically.

"The guys at the front desk just threw it out the other day," Topher explained, "but they said we could use it if we wanted."

"Hm…" Scarlett examined the sofa further. "The scratches are unsightly, but a trivial manner in the grand scheme of things. I suppose we could fashion seats out of this. Excellent find you two."

"Oh it wasn't me," Amy called from behind the curtain, pretending to be Samey. She was clearly visible, so the Not Favorites just sort of stared at her. "I mean…uh…" She turned slightly red and disappeared back behind the curtain.

 **Confessional**

 **Samey:** UGH! Amy is literally the worst. It's only the first episode and she's not even on my team but she's trying to sabotage me? And it was _working?_

 **Scarlett:** Amy is a minor annoyance, and true to form she seems to be targeting her sister. While I understand where she comes from in terms of feeling contempt for one's siblings, her methods are quite lacking in the tact department. Still, I should take advantage of the situation when it comes to head.

"Anyways," Scarlett said, "did anybody find any tools we could use?" B held up a small toolbox. "Okay…anyone else?" Nobody else had found anything. "Ugh, okay, the rest of you just…sit there until I tell you to do something I guess."

The other shrugged and sat around while B and Scarlett got to work dismantling the sofa and putting the two motor bikes together.

Later on, Chris arrived at the pavilion. "Alright contestants," he announced, "let's see what you've got for me!" He tore down the divider, revealing the two vehicles. "Let's start with the Favorites, since they're statistically better and all that."

The Favorites' vehicle was a large canoe that had been fitted with two pairs of wheel. Trash bags had been stuffed inside as seating and padding in the event of a crash. An engine sat in the center of the canoe, hooked up to a set of pedals and then the wheels, which also had more pedals attached to it. There was a steering wheel in the front of the canoe, but it seemed to mostly be for aesthetic purposes.

"Well that's…something," Chris said awkwardly. "So you'd need one person pedaling the engine, and everyone else pedaling the actual wheels?"

"And to turn you'd need people to lean to the side," Harold added.

"I see," Chris said. "Well maybe the Not Favorites will have something that sucks a little less. Or a little more. I'm cool with either."

The Not Favorites' vehicle was two motor bikes that had been duct taped together, fitted with two hand mirrors on each side. Some sofa cushions also balanced on top, secured even more with duct tape. It was also painted pink.

"So that's it then?" Chris asked. The Not Favorites nodded. "Well…this challenge was based on both design and practicality, so I'm going to have to give the win to the team whose vehicle I'm sure actually works. And that would be…

…the Not Favorites."

"What?!" Everyone cried. The Not Favorites then cheered while the Favorites were stunned.

"Hey," Chris interrupted, "I'm not done yet. That was only the first part of the challenge." Now everyone groaned. "The second part of the challenge? Well, meet me at the resort's gate with your vehicles." The teams collected their vehicles and began to move toward the gate.

* * *

"What do you think the second part of the challenge will be?" Samey asked, standing next to Jasmine.

"I'm not sure," Jasmine admitted, "but I wish you good luck in it." Samey smiled, and Jasmine smiled back.

"Ew, gross," Amy said, shoving her sister away. "Get back on your own team, alliance whore."

"A-alliance whore?" Samey repeated. "What does that mean?"

"You're obviously only talking to a _Favorite_ because you plan to form an alliance at the merge, duh," Amy shot back. "Nice try sis, but nobody would want to be in an alliance with you."

"That's uncalled for," Jasmine told Amy. "Samey was just being friendly, which is more than you've ever been."

"Samey doesn't have any friends to be friendly with," Amy argued. "So back off!"

"Time for part two!" Chris said as they reached the gate, not wanting any fights to happen that would delay his schedule. "A race around the edge of the resort. Well, technically two laps around the resort to make it fair. First team to have a vehicle cross the finish line wins." Everyone began to get into their team's vehicle. "Wait, I forgot to mention, each vehicle will only have _one_ person in it during this race."

"But you told us we needed to be able to fit all of our team members!" Courtney cried.

"Well yeah, but not right now," Chris replied. "So yeah, only one driver. Pick wisely."

"I'll do it," Harold volunteered. "I did most of the building so I'll be the one who knows her best."

"Oh please don't tell me you named it," Courtney muttered under her breath.

"Let's get ready to ride," Harold said, patting the side of the canoe. "We can do this…Leshawna." Courtney face-palmed, while Leshawna just rolled her eyes, giving Harold an amused smile.

"Who wants to drive for us?" Topher asked.

"I could do it," Samey said.

"You could," Topher agreed.

"More like you'll just ruin everything!" Amy shouted, overhearing the discussion.

"That's also true," Topher admitted. Samey just sighed.

"I'll drive," Scarlett said. "I was able to trick out the motor bikes with some…extra features, and only I know how to activate them. Ergo, I should drive."

Harold and Scarlett got situated on their vehicles. Harold was ready to pedal the engine, while Scarlett was sitting propped up on some sofa cushions. Chris held a checkered flag near them. "It's two laps around the resort," he reminded them. "One your marks…" Harold began pedaling to fire up the engine, while Scarlett started the bikes up. "Get set…" They both glared at one another and then turned to face the upcoming road. "GO!"

Scarlett sped off, while Harold…didn't move at all. He was furiously pedaling, hoping to start the engine, but to no avail.

"Why isn't he moving?!" Courtney snapped. "Come on Harold, pedal faster!"

"I am, gosh," Harold said. His legs were going pretty fast, but the engine remained completely silent. "Maybe we…uh…forgot to connect the engine to the wheels?"

"Try doing the other pedals then," Trent suggested. "It'll be better than just sitting there."

Harold nodded and moved to the front of the canoe. He began to pedal the front set of wheels, which was much more difficult than pedaling the engine had been. Still, the front set of wheels slowly began to turn, which then made the back set turn as well. After a few seconds the vehicle had begun to move forward at a slow pace.

"Looks like we've got this challenge in the bag," Sugar said happily.

"You know what they say," Jasmine said, "slow and steady wins the race!" Sugar just stared blankly at her. "Uh…from the tortoise and the hare?"

"Tortoise and the hare?" Sugar said. "You mean like what Mama puts in her casserole during Christmas? What's that gotta do with this challenge?" Her stomach growled. "Ooh, I could go for some Tortoise-Hare-Casserole right about now. Do you think they serve that here?" Behind her, Noah rolled his eyes and held a finger gun to his head.

"Come on Harold," Geoff said nervously as the nerd began to pick up speed. "Scarlett can't be _that_ far ahead, can she?"

"She's almost halfway through lap one," Chris confirmed. He gestured to a monitor nearby that showed Scarlett steering her team's vehicle. She seemed to have trouble balancing the wait of the two motorbikes, but it wasn't like she had someone close to catching up to her.

"Come on baby," Leshawna said to herself, "you can do it!"

An intern exited the resort and walked up to Chris. He whispered something in the host's ear. "What?" Chris said. More whispering. "Oh _really_. That's very interesting." The intern nodded and returned to the resort.

"What was that about?" Bridgette asked.

"Nothing," Chris said dismissively. "Don't worry about it."

On the monitor, Scarlett had a quarter of her first lap left. The resort seemed to be split in half between really rocky terrain, and smooth sand. Harold had, after ditching the engine and basically everything else in the canoe, managed to pick up decent speed in the sand portion of it. The spread out weight allowed him to coast through the rocky area as well with only a few bumps.

Scarlett, on the other hand, was finding that balancing on the rocks was much harder than on the sand. She could see Harold was still half a lap behind her, but she didn't want to risk him catching her. She glanced down at a small panel with three buttons.

 **Confessional**

 **Scarlett:** I'm not one for showing off, but I had foreseen the possibility of a racing challenge. So I installed three special features designed specifically for racing. For example…

Scarlett pressed the green button, which released a large cloud of smoke from the back of the vehicle to obscure Harold's vision.

"Woah, no fair!" Harold cried. He leaned as far right as he could, swerving to avoid the cloud. He continued to speed up as Scarlett struggled to stay balanced.

"Ugh," Scarlett said. She crossed the finish line, signifying that her first lap was done, Harold following shortly after.

"Things are getting closer," Chris said, his eyes glued to the screen. Members of both teams crossed their fingers.

"This should stop you," Scarlett said, pressing a red button. A small compartment in the back of the vehicle opened, releasing sharp nails onto the ground. Harold did his best to avoid them, but it was too late. He ran over several nails and slowly came to a stop as the tires deflated.

"NO!" Courtney screamed. "Harold! Get out and push that thing to the finish line!" Harold couldn't hear her, but yelling at least made her feel better.

"Let's end this quickly then," Scarlett decided. She pressed the blue button, which was the last one left. Her vehicle accelerated rapidly, shooting forward and finishing the rest of the lap in a minute.

"And the Not-Favorites cross the finish line first!" Chris announced. Team Not-Favorites cheered, while the Favorites began to fall apart.

"This is all your fault!" Courtney shouted at Dawn. "It was your idea to make the vehicle pedal powered."

"At least she tried to help," Jasmine defended. "All you did was make a list the whole time! Not to mention Amy just tried messing around with the other team."

"Hey I like, found the engine," Amy pointed out.

"The engine that didn't even work," Noah added.

"Guys we need to remain unified," Brick said. "We're a team, and we don't throw anybody under the bus!" He was largely ignored by the rest of his arguing teammates.

"This is really fun," Chris admitted, "but I wasn't finished talking before you all so rudely interrupted me. While the Not-Favorites may have crossed the finish line first, it has been brought to my attention that their vehicle was constructed using two motor bike stolen from one of the staff garages. As I said in the beginning of the challenge, stealing was not allowed. That means I'm disqualifying the entire team from the challenge."

"What?!" Scarlett growled. "You're disqualifying us _now_ after we already did the race?!"

"It was brought to my attention _during_ the race," Chris corrected. "So, uh, yeah. Which I guess means the winners by default are the Favorites!" Upon hearing this, all arguing on the Favorites' team ceased.

"You did it baby," Leshawna said, hugging Harold. "Your weird car boat thing did it!" She kissed him on the cheek.

Scarlett was still fuming over Chris' decision on the challenge, but she told herself to take a deep breath. And she probably would have listened had Max not started to speak.

"That's what you get former minion," Max said with a 'tsk'. He bopped Scarlett on the nose. "Questioning my evil genius was what cost us the challenge, no question."

"Are you kidding me?!" Scarlett snarled. "You're the one who stole the motor bikes in the first place!"

"Yes but you're the one who decided to use them in the design," Max retorted. "Don't try and cast the blame on me when there are others more fitting of the elimination."

"Yeah, like Samey didn't really do anything," Topher pointed out.

"What?!" Samey cried. "I helped you carry the couch."

"Well yeah," Topher said with a shrug, "but you also spent the whole time telling me you were useless."

"That was _clearly_ Amy," Samey groaned.

"I don't know, it sounded a lot like you," Topher said, raising an eyebrow.

"We sound the same!" Samey said, throwing her hands up into the air. Topher was already moving on to talk to someone else.

"Anyways," Chris interrupted, "tonight the Not-Favorites will meet me at the campfire just on the edge of the resort where we'll have the first elimination ceremony of the season. Favorites, as a reward you'll be treated to an authentic Tanzanian feast while the others are voting someone on. That'll be later tonight though, so go back to your rooms." The contestants all left the area, some angrier than others.

The doors in Bungalow 3B were slammed shut multiple times as Scarlett and Samey moved angrily throughout them.

"What's your problem?!" Samey asked, not caring to be polite since she was so frustrated.

"That imbecile is trying to get me eliminated for his mistake," Scarlett said, furiously pouring herself a glass of water. "What about you?"

"Amy's not even on the same team as me and she's still ruining my life," Samey grumbled, throwing a pillow off of the couch and onto the floor. "And Topher actually fell for her trick that wasn't even clever!"

"Pfft," Scarlett scoffed, "you'd think by now you'd have learned how to deal with your sister. Just goes to show that you're unwilling to make a necessary change in your life."

"Excuse me?!" Samey said. "I can't change my sister! I already tried getting her eliminated last season and it didn't work. Now my team is going to vote me out over something that I didn't even do. Again! And what are you complaining about? Who actually listens to what Max has to say?"

 **Confessional**

 **Scarlett:** Hm…Samey's right. Max would never be able to put the blame on me successfully, making Samey the only person at risk. It would be easiest for me to just join the bandwagon it would seem. Interesting.

"So then who would you vote out on this team if you were given the chance?" Scarlett inquired.

"Uh, I don't know," Samey admitted. "I haven't really gotten a chance to talk to anyone yet. I…guess maybe Topher, since he fell for Amy's tricks. Why, do you have an idea?"

Scarlett smirked. "You could say that," she said simply, "but we'll need to make sure we have some others who would vote with us."

A couple bungalows away, Topher sat in the center of his living room with Sugar, Leonard, and Ezekiel. "So the plan is to vote for Samey," he explained. "I'm sure the others will do the same, but I figured I'd spread the word as best as I could."

"Shouldn't we vote out Max, eh?" Ezekiel asked. "Since he broke the rule?"

"That's what Chris would _want_ us to do," Topher said, shaking his head. "And we can't do anything that Chris wants. So are we all fine with voting for Samey?" Ezekiel nodded.

"What do you think Wizard?" Sugar whispered. "I'll vote for whatever you decide."

"It would be most advantageous to consult with my party member Dave," Leonard whispered back, "but he has decided to take a Vow of Absolute and Total Silence, so I guess we'll vote for Samey this time around."

"Sounds like a plan," Sugar said, winking.

Meanwhile, B had been lurking silently at the top of the stairs, listening to the conversation. He frowned and shook his head at the idea of voting out Samey, when all she had done was become a victim of Amy's not even that clever tricks.

He walked past the group in the bungalow, giving a wave to his roommates and knocked on Scarlett and Samey's door. Scarlett answered. "What do you want?" She asked. B gestured to Samey. "What about her?" He made an 'X' shape with his arms. "You want to vote her out?" B furiously shook his head, and then point to his own bungalow. "You…no. The others want to vote her out." B nodded. "Well that much was obvious. It's probably a good idea too-" B glared at her. "Ugh, don't give me that look."

B picked up a stick and drew a crude drawing of Max in the dirt. He looked at Max expectantly. "Yes of course I want him gone," Scarlett sighed, "but it's safest to just go with the majority and put Samey out of her misery." She glanced over her shoulder to make sure Samey wasn't within earshot. "Unless you know someone who might be willing to vote out Max as well." B nodded. Scarlett rolled her eyes. "Well then you better be able to convince me that it'll work," she said flatly. B shrugged.

 **Confessional**

 **Scarlett:** I can respect B's crude yet efficient means of constructing things. I don't however, respect his means of telling me who to vote for…even if he might be right.

* * *

Team Favorites met up at the mess hall for their Tanzanian feast. Traditional dishes such as ugali, biryani, sarapetal, and many more were laid out of them. Unknown dishes contain various meats, fish, vegetables, and sauces were also present. Coffee and other drinks were provided as well.

"Well soldiers," Brick said as they all sat down to eat, "we did good today."

"It's definitely nice to be the winners of the first challenge," Courtney said as she sipped some coffee. "Although it's a bit unfair."

"What do you mean?" Bridgette asked as she tried some of the vegetables since she didn't, you know, eat meat.

"Well we're the Favorites," Courtney remarked, "that means we're _so_ much better than all the Not Favorites it's hardly a competition." Nobody said anything at first.

"You're kind of right," Trent admitted. "Those other guys…they don't look too good."

"Of course they don't," Amy scoffed, " _Samey_ is one of them. Actually, she's probably getting her stupid butt eliminated right now."

Jasmine glanced worriedly in the direction of the campfire. Dawn patted her hand gently. "I'm sure Samey will be fine," she said.

"Can you see that in her aura?" Jasmine asked.

"Er…no," Dawn admitted. Jasmine just sighed.

Over at the campfire, all eleven members of the Not Favorites had cast their votes and gathered around on small stools. Chris stood in front of them, holding up a stack of cards. "Just like in previous seasons," he explained, "symbols of immunity will be handed out at each ceremony. The contestant who does _not_ receive one will be eliminated from the game. This season we will be using safari-themed postcards."

"How will we be getting removed from the premises?" Scarlett inquired.

"That's another twist," Chris said excitedly. "Due to the variety of culture in Africa, a new elimination method will be used. Collectively we'll refer to it as the Rush of Shame. So let's get on with it then. You've all cast your votes. The first person to receive a postcard is…

…Dave."

"Woo," Dave said, little to no emotion in his voice as he caught his postcard.

"The next two," Chris continued, "go to Staci and Ezekiel."

"Alright!" Ezekiel whooped. "Finally not the first one out!"

"Me too!" Staci said, giving him a high-five.

"Sugar, B, and Sadie are also safe," Chris added. The three collected their postcards. Topher, Samey, Scarlett, Max, and Leonard were remaining. "The next person safe is…Topher." Topher gave a fist-pump. "And…Scarlett."

"Interesting," Scarlett remarked to herself upon collecting her postcard. "It would appear I could have voted for whoever I liked this elimination. I wonder if I'll regret that choice later on. Heh, probably not."

Leonard, Samey, and Max all looked nervously at one another as Chris held up the penultimate postcard. "And the second to last person safe is…

…

…

…Leonard."

"Ugh," Dave groaned as Leonard collected his postcard.

"Samey," Chris said. The blonde looked up. "Max." The purple-haired weirdo simply glared. "One of you will be safe tonight. Will it be the lesser twin, or the rule breaker? Well…it's…

…

…

Samey crossed her fingers. Max simply smirked.

…

…

…

…Samey." Samey let out a huge gasp of relief while Max's mouth dropped wide open. Samey jumped up to catch her postcard.

"What?!" Max exclaimed. "How can this be? My EVILness wasn't appreciated?!"

"Guess not," Chris said with a shrug. "Plus you kind of cheated and lost it for your team."

"This isn't over," Max declared, turning to face his team. "You will all rue the day that you messed with pure EVIL-" A tranquilizer dart buried itself in Max's neck. The EVIL genius fell over, twitching slightly. Two interns picked him up and threw him into the back of a Jeep, which then sped off into the wilderness.

"Well that was interesting," Chris remarked. "Alright Not-Favorites, way to keep meeting those low expectations. Go back to your bungalows." The remaining ten members of the team all stood up and left the elimination area. Chris turned to face the camera. "This has been Total Drama: Favorites vs. Not-Favorites."

* * *

 **Voting Confessionals**

 _ **B:** … *votes for Max*_

 _ **Dave:** I'm obviously voting for Leonard. I don't really care if there are any alliances or not. He's annoying!_

 _ **Ezekiel:** Well…Topher says to vote for Samey, eh. So I really hope he's not just trying to fool me and get me out._

 _ **Leonard:** I caste a Curse of Elimination on the cleric Samey._

 _ **Max:** My most EVIL vote goes to the sinister Scarlett. Pathetic ex-minion won't know what hit her!_

 _ **Sadie:** So like, B came up to me with Scarlett, who is super scary by the way, and said to vote out Max instead of Samey. So I was all like, okay, because Max is kind of weird._

 _ **Samey:** I…uh…I'm going to vote for Max! I hope this works…_

 _ **Scarlett:** I've given this a lot of thought. If I vote Samey, I stay in the majority. If I vote Max, I cause a rift yet rid myself of a major annoyance._

 _ **Staci:** Ya…I'm voting for Max because Sadie is voting for him, and in order for her to be more confident I need to vote with her. I would know, being confident was invented by my great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great cousin Grant. Before then, nobody had the confidence to do anything._

 _ **Sugar:** Well the wizard is voting for Samey, and I guess I will too. Last season everything went wrong because we didn't trust our wizard. Well Sugar ain't makin' that mistake again. No siree!_

 _ **Topher:** Well Samey, I hate to say goodbye because the Internet ships us and you'd be a great tool in furthering my career, but you said it yourself. You're no good._

 **Votes:** Scarlett (1 – Max), Leonard (1 – Dave), Samey (4 – Ezekiel, Leonard, Sugar, Topher)

* * *

 _ **Team Favorites:**_ _Amy, Brick, Bridgette, Courtney, Dawn, Geoff, Harold, Jasmine, Leshawna, Noah, Trent_

 _ **Team Not Favorites:**_ _B, Dave, Ezekiel, Leonard, Sadie, Samey, Scarlett, Staci, Sugar, Topher_

 _ **Eliminated:**_ _Max_

* * *

 **And there we have it, the first elimination of the story. Man it is** _ **good to be back.**_ **Now watch me disappear for another two years until the next chapter. Kidding, probably. No set update schedule, but I'll try and write a lot more since school will be getting out in a month or so and I've got a lot more free time.**

 **Anyways, let's talk about Max. He was always going to be the first boot. I don't particularly like writing him as aside from the EVIL part he's not super funny. At the end, I was honestly debating between him and Samey as it seemed in-character for Scarlett to pick either of them, but in the end she chose Max because he's a greater annoyance. I wonder how things would have played out if Samey was eliminated first instead…hm.**

 **Well that's all I have for you guys! Thanks so much for reading, reviews are always appreciated, and see you next time~**


	3. E3: In the Jungle, Well, Savannah

**Hey worldwide web,**

 **Back with another chapter, woo! I appreciate all the feedback I've gotten on the past two and I hope you all enjoy this next installment! I've been able to get a lot of writing done thanks to a summer writing challenge I'm a part of, so hopefully we'll get some more frequent updates coming up. For now, enjoy this chapter! Here we go~**

 **Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

* * *

A loud crash woke Samey up from her restless sleep. She had been having a nightmare that Amy had managed to join her team and once again convinced everyone on it to vote her out. Only this time, even Jasmine had turned on her. She at first welcomed the chance to wake up, but a loud screeching from the next room only worried her further.

"Scarlett?" She called out into the hallway. "Is everything okay?!" There was another crash from Scarlett's room. Samey ran down the hall and threw open the door.

Inside, Scarlett was engaged in a fight with what looked like a monkey. It was hooting loudly and throwing pillows at her as she tried to hit it with her suitcase.

"Don't move!" Scarlett ordered, not that she had to tell Samey twice. "You'll only aggravate it further. Baboons can bite their way through human bone if provoked into doing so." Samey only stared helplessly at the aggravated creature. It jumped around on Scarlett's bed, flinging feces, which Scarlett blocked with the suitcase.

The baboon lunged at Scarlett, landing on the suitcase. It began to claw at the fabric, trying to get to her. Scarlett grunted and hurled the suitcase out the open bedroom window with the baboon still attached to it. Scarlett stood near the window, breathing heavily.

"Are you okay?" Samey asked, taking a few steps into the room, making sure she didn't tread over any monkey droppings.

"I'm fine," Scarlett said flatly, brushing a lock of hair out of her face. "The baboon came through my window as I was getting dressed. It startled me, but I'm fine." She wrinkled her nose in disgust at the floor. "They're disgusting animals, but it could have been much worse."

"Well...I'm glad you're not hurt," Samey said, rubbing her arm awkwardly.

"Thank you," Scarlett said as she picked up the scat covered rug and tossed it out the window before shutting it. "I advise that we keep the windows closed unless absolutely necessary. The air conditioning works fine so we don't have to worry about it getting too hot."

"Okay," Samey said. "I'm going to go get dressed then." Scarlett just gave her a dismissive wave.

 **Confessional**

 **Samey:** Scarlett really helped me out last time by not voting for me. She's kind of scary because of what she did last season, but she's a way better roommate than Amy, that's for sure. I mean, even the baboon would have been a better roommate than Amy. Heh.

Over on the other side of the resort, a sharp whistle pierced the silence in Room 5A. Bridgette let out a surprised shriek and Courtney immediately shout out of bed at the sound. The two girls exited their rooms, spotting one another in the hall.

"What was that?" Bridgette asked, pulling her sweatshirt on over her regular t-shirt.

"I'm not sure," Courtney said, still in her pajamas. "But if I had to guess-" Another whistle blow. "Ugh, it's Brick!" She stomped down the stairs, Bridgette too groggy to follow her, to find Brick standing near the door and blowing his whistle.

"Rise and shine, ma'am!" Brick said eagerly, giving Courtney a salute. Courtney was half tempted to give him a "salute" of her own, but decided that it would be lacking in tact. "You might want to get dressed," Brick continued. "We've got a busy day waiting for us.

"Brick what are you doing?" Courtney asked, folding her arms over her chest.

"I'm getting ready for morning exercises," Brick explained. "I want our team to be in tip-top shape, and in order for that to happen we need to make sure we're putting in all the right effort. So each morning we're going to do some exercises as a team."

"I see," Courtney said, her expression still not amused. "And how do you plan on getting our less cooperative team members to participate? They're hardly all the cooperative type."

"I'm sure they'll be willing," Brick replied, shaking his head. "Can't be on a team if you don't act like it. I take it you'll be joining me?"

"As pathetic as it would be to see you doing exercises alone..." Courtney said, "...no." She turned around and went upstairs, leaving a dumbfounding Brick.

"What was all that about?" Bridgette asked, having gotten completely dressed.

"Just Brick being a _loser_ ," Courtney said, shaking her head. Bridgette gave her a look. "What?"

"He's our teammate," Bridgette reasoned. "Be nice to him."

"He was trying to get us to all exercise as some sort of group bonding session," Courtney scoffed. "I don't want to bond with these people. Most of them can't stand me! Not to mention the feeling's mutual..."

"If you say so," Bridgette said with a shrug. Courtney returned to her room to get ready for the day and Bridgette went downstairs to get some food.

Brick continued to go to the rest of his teammates' bungalows to get them to participate in his morning drills. They all declined, some more respectively than others.

"I need my beauty sleep," Leshawna explained. "All this lusciousness has to happen overnight somehow, if you know what I'm saying."

"Fucking loser," Amy simply spat at him.

After getting his final rejection from Trent, Brick went about doing his morning exercise by himself. It was kind of sad, but he was used to working out alone like last time he was on Total Drama. Having Jo around as a workout rival would have been nice, for maybe three seconds before she started belittling him.

 **Confessional**

 **Brick:** So the first day was more rough than I had expected. The team's not too big on cooperation right now. I'm sure that'll change soon. We have to start working together sometime.

* * *

It was actually two days before the next challenge came around. Brick had woken up his team each day to try and convince them to exercise with him, and each day he had been told no.

"I just prefer to do my own thing," Jasmine admitted. "Nothing personal mate."

"Dude some of us don't want to get up at six in the morning," Geoff groaned.

By the time challenge day rolled around, the two teams met in the main lodge for breakfast. The Not Favorites, while still gross and weird, didn't seem as exhausted as some of the Favorites did.

"We'll still crush them again today," Courtney said confidently. "They're down a member, and we've already proven to be superior."

"Plus we've got some great teamwork!" Brick added.

"Yeah sure, that too or whatever."

The Not Favorites ignored their competitors. With Max gone, everyone seemed to be a lot less irritated.

"It sure is nice to have my own room," Sugar said happily. "With Max gone, I get to use one bed for sleepin' and another bed for jumpin'! And sometimes, if I leave my window open, a free midnight snack will climb in. Last night I had some porcupine pot pie. And look!" She pulled a quill out from somewhere on her body. "I got some toothpicks for later!"

"I'm glad you told me to shut our windows," Samey told Scarlett with a nervous laugh.

"Agreed," Scarlett said, not taking her eyes off of her food.

"Um..." Samey looked around. Most of her teammates were busy eating or chatting among themselves. "I just wanted to say thanks."

"For what?" Scarlett asked.

"For not voting for me," Samey said. "You could have easily voted for me with the others and I would have been done. So thank you."

Scarlett blinked. "Well," she said after a while, "you're welcome. My decision was influenced more by my annoyance with Max than anything, but I suppose that by default I consider you a more valuable asset."

"Really?" Samey gasped.

"Not by much," Scarlett said. "You're still too submissive and socially weak, but you're better than Max. I also respect your choice back in Pahkitew. While I personally saw through your disguise almost immediately, it seemed to do the trick in fooling all the others."

"Oh...that," Samey mumbled. "I shouldn't have done that. It didn't get me any further than Amy in the end. Plus she still treats me like garbage."

"You are kind of garbage," Scarlett pointed out. Samey gave her a pained look. "Even garbage has its use and can be refined into something that's, well...not garbage."

"I don't think I like thinking that way," Samey admitted.

Scarlett shrugged. "I suppose as of now you can consider us temporary allies," she explained. "You'll obviously need my help if you want to get any further, and I'll need yours."

"Why?" Samey asked. "If I'm 'kind of garbage'."

Scarlett winced. "I don't believe in taking back what I said, or apologizing unless it's necessary, so I'll stand by my point. People root for you, especially when they see how Amy treats you. By association, I'll look better with you on my side. Understand?"

Samey thought about it for a few seconds, but began to slowly nod. "I think so...does this mean we're an alliance now?"

"Not until we lose a challenge," Scarlett said. "If that happens today, well, you're going to need me."

 **Confessional**

 **Samey:** Scarlett's really going to help me this season! Well, in a backwards sort of way. I don't like her calling me garbage, but I've been called worse so I guess I'll just deal with it. This is already going way better than Pahkitew!

"Dudes," Geoff said over at the Favorites' table, "I know the challenges and Chris kind of suck, but it actually feels really good to be back. Hopefully I'll be staying for a long time."

"As long as you don't go nuts again," Trent said with a laugh.

Geoff gave Trent a confused look. "What do you mean?" He asked.

"You know," Trent replied, "like how you were on the Aftermath. All arrogant and desperate for ratings. Kind of like, the Chris 2.0"

Topher's eye twitched as he talked with Dave and Leonard.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Geoff said defensively. "I mean yeah, I got a bit harsh, but I don't think I was as bad as Chris." He turned to Bridgette. "Was I as bad as Chris?"

"Uh..." Bridgette glanced at Trent, Courtney, and Leshawna, who just looked right back at her. "No babe...of course not. Nobody's as bad as Chris."

"I think you're just trying to make me feel better," Geoff admitted. "Gosh dudes, I didn't know I was that bad. Are you sure it was me?"

"It was definitely you," Trent said. Courtney nodded in agreement.

"Don't feel bad sweetie," Bridgette told her boyfriend, putting a hand on his shoulder. "You realized what you were doing wrong...I think, and you got better. That's all that matters to me. Who cares if you were like Chris?"

"Somebody say my name?" The aforementioned host asked as he entered the main lodge. "How were you two days of rest?" He was already continuing before they could give an honest answer. "Today is another challenge day. That means the winning team will get immunity and some sort of African themed reward. The losers have to vote somebody out in an African themed elimination. You guys have three minutes to finish eating and then meet me at the entrance to the resort." With that, he left the contestants to finish up.

"Have you guys seen Chef since we first got here?" Topher asked as the teams left the main lodge.

"No," Sadie said, "that's soooooooo weird. Do you think he, like, died?"

"Oh I hope not," Staci said, "Chef reminds me of my great-great-great-great-great-great-" she stopped when Sadie gave her a look. "Whoops, sorry. Force of habit, which was invented by-"

"Maybe let's wait until we get to the challenge to talk," Sadie suggested. Staci nodded in agreement.

 **Confessional**

 **Staci:** Ugh, being a good friend is sooooooo hard. I want to help Sadie, ya, but I also really want to impress my team with my family. I so wish my great-great-great-great-great-great-great aunt Ursula was here. She was really good with making tough decisions.

 **Sadie:** Katie I miss you _so_ much! Being friends with Staci is soooooo hard. But like, I'd feel awful if I left her with no one. I wish you were here. You're really good with making tough decisions...

* * *

The contestants met Chris at the resort entrance, where he was waiting with Chef and a couple of actual, working safari vehicles. "We're going to have a small challenge first before we get on to the main event," Chris explained. "The winners of the first challenge will have the advantage of going first in the second one."

"Going first for what?" Jasmine asked.

"I can't tell you that just yet," Chris replied, waggling his eyebrows. Jasmine just rolled her eyes. Chris gestured to a small clump of trees about a hundred meters away. "See those trees? Those are the perfect habitat for the boomslang, a highly venomous African snake."

"Don't tell me our challenge is to catch one," Dave groaned.

"Boomslang skin is an important potion ingredient," Leonard gasped.

"No no no," Chris said, shaking his head. "We already found a boomslangs. It's going to be used in a game called Tanzanian Roulette." Chef wheeled out a large, circular cart with six urns on it. "Much like the similarly named game, we'll spin around the cart and a volunteer will stick their hand down the urn closest to them. First person to get bitten loses the challenge for their team."

"That's horrible!" Courtney complained. "Your challenges are always dangerous but this one's the worst!"

"If you think this is bad, you should see what else I have in store for today," Chris said with a smirk. "Besides, Chef is on-site with an antidote to the boomslang's venom." Everyone looked over to see that Chef was now wearing a nurse's outfit and holding a first-aid kit.

"Whoever goes will have a one in six chance of being bitten," Scarlett calculated.

"Dawn can't you just tell us which urn the snake is in?" Jasmine asked.

"No she can't," Chris said. "Or she'll be disqualified."

"I'm sorry my friends," Dawn sighed. "The host has spoken."

"Let's get this challenge started then," Chris announced, clapping his hands together. "Who's going first?" Nobody looked at all eager to volunteer.

"I guess I'll do it," Jasmine said with a shrug. "I mean...one in six isn't so bad, right?" Chef spun around the urns for a few seconds. Jasmine stared at the one closest to her. She gulped and reached down into it. Everyone was looking at her. "I...oh, it's the bottom." She let out a sigh of relief and pulled her unharmed hand back out.

"Next!" Chris yelled. "Someone from the Not Favorites please."

"Samey's the only one you could afford to lose," Amy said. "Have her do it."

The Not Favorites looked at Samey. "Oh," the lesser twin said, "um...alright. I can do it I guess." She approached the urns. Chef spun them around and a different urn, even though they were all identical, sat in front of her. Samey nervous lowered her hand into the urn and eventually found the smooth bottom of it.

"Lame!" Amy exclaimed. "It would have been funnier if you had been bitten."

"Girl you have got issues," Leshawna told Amy.

"Now for a Favorite," Chris said.

"I'll do it," Geoff said, raising his hand. He approached the urns.

"Geoff be careful," Bridgette called out to him nervously.

"Relax babe," Geoff replied, "life's all about taking risks. I'll be fine." He still hesitated slightly before sticking his hand down into the urn. "Hm...I don't feel anything...there's the bottom! Alright!"

"Oh thank goodness," Bridgette sighed.

Leonard decided to go next for the Not Favorites. "The chance to acquire such a rare ingredient for my potions, without having to use my mom's credit card, is too good of an opportunity to mess up."

 **Confessional**

 **Leonard:** The last time I tried to brew a potion using my mom's credit card, I ended up purchasing the ingredients on some dark site in the shadowy realms of the Internet. The police officers weren't very understanding, even after I showed them my official wizarding crest. Luckily my mom could drive the both of us to community service.

Leonard reached into the urn closest to him and felt around. "Drat," he said, coming back with nothing. "I suppose I won't be the envy of my guild when I get back."

"Is it bad that I wanted the snake to be in that urn?" Dave asked Sadie. "Like...I _really_ wanted it to be in there."

"I guess I'll go to get this over with," Noah sighed. "Although I'm sure with my luck I'll end up getting bitten." Chef spun the urns. Noah stuck his hand down the one closest to him. Within a few seconds he jumped. "Yep, called it." He lifted his hand out of the urn, revealing it to have two punctures on it that were starting to turn purple.

"This should only take a second," Chef grumbled as he lifted Noah over his shoulder and took him back to the resort.

"Is he going to be okay?" Samey asked.

"Be quiet Samey," Amy snapped. "He won't let you touch his dick even if he dies, gawd."

"That's not what I-" Samey attempted to say, before being cut off by Chris.

"Moving on," Chris said. "That's okay, because the Favorites would have had to sit somebody out in this challenge anyway." Chef returned a few seconds later.

"The snake only got a little venom in him," Chef explained. "I gave him the antidote and left him with the medics to keep an eye on him. He should be fine."

"Sounds good," Chris said. "Alright, the rest of you, get into one of the vehicles. We're going out into the savanna for the next challenge." The contestants, separated by their teams, climbed into the vehicles and the two hosts took off into the brush.

"Well at least the only person we lost was Noah," Courtney said, holding on tightly to the side of the vehicle. "He isn't very useful in challenges anyway."

"We should never leave a man behind," Brick told her. "Noah should have come with us." Courtney just rolled her eyes.

 **Confessional**

 **Brick:** Courtney hasn't responded well to my attempts at getting the team working like a well oiled machine, but I'm sure she'll come around. She has to realize that the best way to win this game is to work together.

"At least he won't be able to pull that thing back in season one where he sat out on purpose," Geoff said.

"What are you talking about?" Bridgette asked.

"Noah," Geoff answered, "he did that thing where he chose not to participate. Yeah, not cool."

"That was like, three years ago or something," Trent said.

"Exactly," Geoff declared, "It just goes to show that we all do things in the past that we aren't proud of."

The others gave him a couple weird glances as they arrived at the challenge destination: A large open field with tall grass and a large rocky structure jutting out of the middle of it.

"This is a kopje," Chris explained, "a geographical phenomena found all over Africa. More important than that, animals like lions love to use them for shelter."

"Please don't tell me this is going where I think it is," Scarlett grumbled.

"Conveniently for us," Chris continued, "a pride of lions is using this kopje as their home right now! Chef and I had placed two statues, one green and one yellow, in the center of the kopje. Your challenge today will be to retrieve your team's statue."

"Question," Sadie said, raising her hand. "Isn't that, like, _really_ dangerous? What if we get eaten?"

"You won't get eaten," Chris answered. "Probably. Now the way this works is that you can make attempts at getting the statues individually, or in pairs. We'll alternate which team makes the attempts starting with the Not-Favorites because they won the pre-challenge."

"Can we have a moment to strategize?" Scarlett requested. Chris shrugged and nodded. The two teams formed separate huddles. "Okay," Scarlett whispered, "this is our chance to stop the Favorites' number advantage. They have Dawn, who can apparently talk to animals, but we have someone who was an actual animal." She looked over at Ezekiel.

The farm boy blinked in surprise. "No way, eh," he said, putting up his hands. "I'm not like that anymore. I'm doing better. If I tried to act all feral again, I could relapse."

Scarlett's eyes narrowed. "If you don't, we could lose this challenge, and then you'd be sent packing! Surely a million dollars is worth the chance of relapse?"

Ezekiel folded his arms over his chest. "I'm not doing it," he said firmly. Scarlett grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and pulled him close. Her eyes stared at him fiercely. "Er...maybe I should give it a try...just once."

"Good," Scarlett said, releasing him. "Took you longer than it should have, but I'm glad we've reached a consensus." The others just watched the scene unfold, not sure what to say.

 **Confessional**

 **Scarlett:** My methods may be harsh, but they're effective.

Over in the Favorites' huddle, Courtney was laying down a plan. "Even if we go second," she said, "we can still beat them. I'll be going first, so we can end this challenge as quickly as possible."

"Ma'am," Brick said, raising his hand. "Permission to speak?"

"Ugh, what do you want Brick?" Courtney asked, rolling her eyes.

"I firmly believe that we should decide an order to participate in as a team," Brick said. "We can't leave this all on the shoulders of one person."

"Fine," Courtney huffed. "All against me being the first to risk my life for the sake of the team say 'Aye'." Nobody said anything. "Well that's that then, looks like I'm going first." Brick just frowned as the huddle broke up.

"Ready to go?" Chris asked. "You don't really have a choice. Not Favorites, who is going first?"

"I will, eh," Ezekiel volunteered. Chris shrugged and pointed to the entrance of the kopje. Ezekiel gulped nervously.

 **Confessional**

 **Ezekiel:** I can do this yo. I have to start doing actual challenges if I don't want to be kicked off early.

* * *

Ezekiel walked toward the kopje, entering the waist high grass. He wasn't sure what he was expecting to be waiting for him, aside from lions.

He was about halfway to the kopje when he heard grass rustling. He instinctively fell to all fours and began growling, before shaking his head to clear it. "Keep it together Zeke," he told himself, "remember what your doctor said. Control." He slowly got to his feet, coming face to face with a female lion.

The lioness growled and Ezekiel began to step back, still on the ground. He let out a few growls and the lioness looked confused. It was working! He continued to growl, trying to remember how he communicated with animals in the past.

A couple more lionesses joined the group, surrounding him. They didn't appear to be malicious, more curious. That was a good thing right? Ezekiel took another deep breath and remembered what he needed to stay. He opened his mouth...

...and nothing happened. Ezekiel tried again, but nothing came out. The lionesses snapped out of their daze and growled. Ezekiel jumped up to his feet, holding up his hands in defense. He tried to let out a few growls, but found himself unable to. His therapist would be frustrated with him, his parents would be disappointed. He couldn't do it. He felt tears well up in his eyes as he began to run back to the others, the lions only giving chase about halfway.

"And Ezekiel is...back?" Chris's voice trailed off as Ezekiel broke down sobbing in the dirt. "Uh...okay, weird, but he doesn't have the statue so it looks like it's time for the Favorites to go next."

"Ugh," Scarlett groaned, "what happened to you?!"

"I'm sorry," Ezekiel said, trying to wipe his eyes. His entire body was trembling. "I couldn't do it. I couldn't do it." He continued to repeat the phrase as the rest of his teammates stared at Scarlett.

"What?!" She snapped. "It's not my fault he wasn't up to the task! I should have known better than to place the team's trust in someone of such a low mental caliber."

"Hey that's not very fair," Bridgette said with a frown. "You tried to take advantage of his mental health issues and it didn't work."

"Mind your own business," Scarlett spat. "I believe it's your team's turn anyways. I'll enjoy watching one of you get eaten by lions." She laughed sinisterly at the thought.

 **Confessional**

 **Samey:** Maybe being allies with Scarlett isn't such a great idea after all...she's kind of a terrible person. But she's really smart so I don't know.

Courtney bent down to pick up some small rocks that she found in the dirt. She stuffed them into her pockets and began to slowly creep into the grass. She couldn't hear anything moving around, which was a good sign. She slowly retrieved one of the rocks and tossed it as far as she could. It landed somewhere in the grass, and was followed by a growl and far away rustling. It was working.

Courtney figured that if she could distract the lions with other things that might be moving around in the grass, they wouldn't pay any attention to her. She crawled through the brush, making sure she didn't rustle any grass or kick up any dirt. She tossed another rock and the lions supposedly went for it. The sounds were closer this time, and she shivered slightly at the thought.

Soon enough, she found herself at the mouth of the kopje. It was dark inside, but she could see the glittering of the statues. Perfect. She took a step forward. Crack! The bottom of her shoe came in contact with a stick, splitting it in two. The rustling in the grass stopped. Courtney stood, frozen in place, looking over her shoulder. A single lioness emerged from the grass.

In an instant, Courtney was gone. She launched herself at the side of the kopje, pulling herself onto the rock and up toward the top. The lioness snarled and tried to follow her, but Courtney had too much of a head start. Mentally reprimanding herself for not first grabbing the statues, the CIT slid down the other side of the kopje and ran back to the others.

"I was...so...close," Courtney gasped, sitting down and putting her head between her knees in an attempt to recover her breathing.

"Kind of like your track record with this show, huh?" Chris remarked. The leftover rock in Courtney's pocket hit him in the face. "Ow! Ugh, someone from the Not-Favorites go."

The Not-Favorites all looked at Scarlett, who rolled her eyes. "Ah yes," she deadpanned, "pick me because I'm apparently the mean one. Well luckily for me I've had experience dealing with lions on this show. This will be a walk in the park, literally." She walked off toward the grass.

"Um," Samey said, confused, "weren't the animals in Pahkitew Island robots?"

"Ugh of course they were Samey," Amy groaned. "Gawd, way to ask such an obvious question _nobody_ else needed answered." The others shook their heads at the siblings.

Scarlett had picked up a large clump of grasses and wove them into a thick rope. She stayed on the outer edge of the field, not entering the grass. She had determined that the lions wouldn't attack her unless she walked in it. This fact was later proven by all the lions watching from inside the field. Undeterred by their presence, she continued to collect enough grass to make a large rope. Then, she tied a large rock to one end of the rope, and a smaller rock to the other.

 **Confessional**

 **Scarlett:** It was a rudimentary grappling hook. The large weight was woven through a tree to keep it steady, while the smaller weight served as a "hook" of sorts that would allow me to reach the kopje without having to touch the ground. From there, I could lower myself down into the den, grab the statue, climb back up, and take the rope back outside the field. It was so easy, even the other members of my team could have likely come up with it.

As Scarlett did just what she had described in the Confessional, she found herself unsure how she was going to make it across the rope. Walking across it would require the utmost stability, and someone with her mindset was anything but stable. Climbing across it like a child would climb monkey bars required upper body strength, which she lacked, and would leave her vulnerable to the lions jumping up at her. After much deliberation, she ended up crawling across it like a squirrel on a power line. She wobbled a bit, but eventually reached the kojpe. Now for phase two.

Scarlett found the smaller rock and tied it to another length of grass rope that was already looped around her waist. She found an opening in the top and slowly began to lower herself down, eyes on the statue. It was a few feet away from where she was, but she slowly began to rock back and forth to gain enough momentum to grab the statue. Just as her fingers reached out to touch the statue, the rope snapped.

Several curse words echoed through the kopje as Scarlett fell to the ground, thankfully only having been about a foot from it in the first place. She quickly regained her senses and reached for the statue, but instead grabbing a small ball of fur.

"A lion cub!" She exclaimed to nobody but herself, doing one of those monologues. She quickly dropped the baby lion, causing it to cry out. Within seconds a female lion came running into the den, and Scarlett barely had enough time to jump for the rope and pull herself out.

"Harder than it looks, huh?" Chris asked mockingly as Scarlett returned to the group.

"I didn't calculate for the possibility of lion cubs being present in the den," Scarlett growled. "Surely there are some international regulations preventing us from doing this challenge with them around..."

"Oh there are," Chris admitted, "we're just ignoring them. Next!"

"Trent let's try teaming up on this one," Geoff suggested. "One of us can act as bait and the other one can go in and grab the statue!"

Trent shrugged. "Sure," he said, "but you'll be the bait."

Geoff rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. "Actually..." he said, "I was thinking _you_ could be the bait."

Trent frowned. "We'll flip for it," he said, pulling out coin. "Heads you're the bait, tails I'm the one that sneaks and gets the statue."

Geoff nodded. "Sounds good- hey wait a second!" He glared at Trent, who just laughed.

"Alright," Trent said, putting a hand on Geoff's shoulder, "if it means that much to you I'll be the bait."

"Thanks man!" Geoff said, giving Trent a fist bump. "Let's do this!"

"Be careful Geoff," Bridgette called to him as he and Trent disappeared into the field. "Oh I hope he'll be alright." Courtney raised an eyebrow at her. "What?"

"Nothing," Courtney said dismissively, "just that it's the first season you two are actually competing on together as a couple. It's been, what, three years? You'd think by now you'd have been on together. Unless you count Action, which uh, you shouldn't."

Bridgette rolled her eyes when Courtney wasn't looking. "I guess you're right," she remarked. "This is the first real time Geoff and I are competing together. It's kind of weird to think about. You don't think that's a bad thing do you?"

"Definitely not," Courtney scoffed. "As I'm sure you know, my experiences with relationships on reality TV have been nothing but awful. Be glad you got this far without having to compete with him."

Bridgette decided it was probably in everyone's best interest not to continue the discussion of Courtney's past relationships and the _many_ flaws they had. Instead she focused on waiting for her boyfriend to get back.

Said boyfriend was almost to the kopje. Trent had ran ahead, getting the attention of all the female lions and luring them over to a tree he was hiding in. Geoff, crouching so as not to be seen over the grass, made it to the kopje and went inside.

"Woah," he said, not caring about being loud since as far as he knew the kopje was empty. "It's really dark in here..." He made sure to step over the little cubs that were curled up on the floor as he looked for his team's statue. There it was, right up against some large rock. "Sweet!"

Geoff bent down to the pick up the statue, and that was when the "rock" moved. IT rolled over, revealing itself to actually be a massive male lion that was too far asleep to be woken up by the Geoff's presence. The lion yawned and draped a large paw over Geoff's crouched form, pulling him close to its body. Geoff whimpered, holding the statue tighter in his hands. The sleeping lion wiggled around on the ground for a few more seconds before beginning to snore.

 **Confessional**

 **Geoff:** It takes a lot to put me out man, like, a LOT. But that was one of the freakiest things I had ever done. This lion was just spooning me in the cave. I didn't know what I was gonna do.

Geoff slowly began to squirm out of the lion's grip, but as soon as he was free the lion began to get up. Geoff threw himself back under the lion's leg and it dozed off again. Crap.

Trent meanwhile was up in the tree, watching the lionesses try and get him from high up the branches. "Come on Geoff," he said, watching the kopje off in the distance, "hurry up."

Back inside, Geoff had tried three more times to leave the kopje without waking the lion, and all three times he had failed. Still, fourth time's the charm.

He wiggled out of the lion's grip and just as the lion stirred, he got an idea. It would mean giving up the win, but it was better than getting eaten. Geoff placed the statue back under the lion's paw and it relaxed before going back to the sleep. Geoff quickly sprinted out of the kopje and toward the others.

Trent saw Geoff in the distance as the female lions took off and assumed that meant they had won. Needless to say, he wasn't pleased when he got back.

"It was really hard," Geoff said, telling everyone what had happened.

"So you couldn't have just ran off with the statue?" Courtney said, folding her arms over her chest.

"Naw brah," Geoff told her. "It needed something to snuggle with. Also, I totally get why girls like being the little spoon now."

"Why didn't you just put the other team's statue in your place?" Harold asked. "That way you could have placated the lion _and_ won the challenge."

Geoff blinked. "Uh..."

"Great," Courtney grumbled, "now it'll be even harder for whoever goes next to get the statue. Great job Geoff!"

"Fun as this is," Chris interrupted, "we've kind of got a time limit here. Not-Favorites, you're up!"

"I guess I'll do it," Topher said confidently, marching out into the grass.

"That's it?" Dave quipped. "No plan?"

"Oh I have a plan!" Topher called back to his team. "I've got to impress the lady lions, and I know just how to do it." He took a deep breath. "Attention campers!" He yelled. "We've got a challenge today!"

"Is that supposed to be a Chris impression?" Sadie asked. "Because it's really...bad."

"Ooh!" Staci said. "I can do a really good impression of my..." Her voice trailed off as Sadie gave her a look. "I mean...someone else's great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandfather. He invented impressions."

 **Confessional**

 **Sadie:** Well...it's an improvement. Kind of.

"Come on we've got an elimination ceremony," Topher continued. He heard lots of rustling grass near him. "I think it's working! Come on ladies, it's the one and only Chris- AAAAAAH!" A lioness leapt out of the grass and clawed at Topher, scratching up his arm. He screamed and ran back to his team.

"Well that was...interesting," Chris said awkwardly. "Next!"

"I'll give it a shot," Bridgette volunteered, walking into the grass. "I learned some things from working with Bruno that might be able to help me." She made her way toward the kopje. When a female lion approached her, she passively crouched down. The lioness limped toward her.

"Here, let me see your paw," she said softly. The lioness hesitated, but allowed her to take a look. A thorn was stuck in it. "Oh dear..." She gently pulled the thorn out and the lioness scampered off. Bridgette stood back up and slowly made it to the kopje. She took care to avoid the cubs and found the statue. "This isn't so bad- woah!" Her foot hit something soft, but thick, and she fell forward.

The male lion roared. The thing Bridgette had tripped over was his tail. He got up and growled at her. Bridgette, knowing she couldn't grab the statue _and_ escape, turned and ran back to her group. Fortunately the male lion was rather lazy and didn't give chase.

"Let me show you how it's done," Sugar boasted, cracking her knuckles. "Imma go and wrassle that lion and show him who's in charge."

"Sugar I don't think that's-" Samey began, but was cut off by Amy throwing a rock at her. "Ow!"

"Ugh Samey, stop standing in the way of my rock throwing," Amy said, rolling her eyes. "You're so useless!"

"Don't you worry," Sugar told her teammate. "I've been wrasslin' bears since I could walk. And before that, I fought gators! But that's a young girl's game now..."

"Every time you talk I'm more and more confused about where you're from exactly," Dave remarked, but didn't get any response.

Sugar entered the grass and was immediately found by one of the lioness. "Pffft," Sugar scoffed, "fightin' kittens is for city folk. Outta my way!" The lioness roared at her. "Ooooh, those are fightin' words!"

Sugar and lioness lunged for one another, landing on the ground in a heap of claws, nails, blood, and dust. The others couldn't see what was going on within the cloud. Sugar's cries of pain pierced the air.

"That doesn't sound good," Chris said. "MEDIC!"

Two medics and Chef ran into the field and were able to separate the lion from a bloody and scratched up Sugar.

"Did I win?" She asked deliriously.

"Not even close," Chris told her flatly. "Take her to the infirmary where she can wait with Noah. Favorites, you're up."

As Sugar was taken away, Brick marched toward the grass. "I can use a similar method to the one I used on the gophers on Revenge of the Island," he explained. "My boots should smell bad enough to scare the lions away." He puffed out his chest.

"He really shouldn't be proud of that," Amy deadpanned.

Brick unlaced one of his boots and picked it up. He slowly walked toward the kopje. A couple lionesses found him, prompting him to throw his boot at them. They gave it a sniff and that batted it away with a paw.

"Oh," Brick said, "well...let's see how you like another load of that!" He threw his second boot, getting the same result. "Shoot!" The lionesses snarled and jumped at him. "AAAAAAAAAAH!" Brick turned and ran back to his team.

"How'd it go?" Chris asked. He was playing some mobile game on his phone and not paying attention to whether or not Brick had the statue.

"Mission failure," Brick said with a dejected sigh.

"I figured," Chris replied, still not looking up from his phone as he tapped the screen a couple of times. "That means the Not Favorites are up next."

Scarlett looked over who was left. "We're doomed," she said.

"Fear not!" Leonard announced. "For my fellow adventurer Dave and I will bring our party to victory!"

"We will?" Dave asked dryly.

"Of course we will!" Leonard cried. "Come quickly my brother in arms. Glory awaits us!" He charged off into the grass, Dave following with an unenthusiastic demeanor.

 **Confessional**

 **Dave:** Normally I wouldn't have gone into that field with Leonard, but even if we don't make it back with a statue there's no way they'd vote out me over him...

"So what exactly are you planning to do?" Dave asked.

"I am going to use my newly obtained perk," Leonard explained. "I spent weeks before the showing leveling up my Animal Husbandry skill and now I have the ability to use the Animal Legion skill. It will allow us to take control of this pride of lions for our use in the next battle! And hopefully they'll hand over the statue too."

"So basically we're doomed then," Dave sighed. He looked over to see Leonard drawing something in the dirt. "What are you doing?"

"My spell needs a special rune for it to work," Leonard said. "I want to finish before the lions show up."

"Too late," Dave said as a couple lionesses walked over to them. The lions were likely fed up after so many people were coming to their den. One of them stamped out Leonard's "rune" with her paw.

"We may have to change our plans," Leonard said.

"Run away?" Dave suggested.

"No, I haven't leveled up my Running skill yet."

"Well I'm out of here," Dave said, running off. Leonard followed behind him. The lions just watched them leave, knowing that it wouldn't be worth chasing after them.

"None of you have gotten the statue yet?!" Chris asked, throwing up his hands in frustration. "This is ridiculous. Somebody please just end this!"

"Who's going to go next for us?" Courtney asked her team. "Preferrably someone who _won't_ mess up."

"Fine, I'll do it," Amy and Leshawna said in unison. They turned to glare at each other. "Hey! Stop that! Quit saying everything I'm saying. No, you quit!"

"Why don't you both go?" Bridgette suggested, stepping between the two. "Maybe if you both go and use two different plans, we'll have a better shot."

"Hmph," Amy grumbled, "fine." She and Leshawna stormed into the grass. After a few seconds of walking in place, Amy turned to her teammate. "Can you like, not?"

"What am I doing?" Leshawna asked, narrowing her eyes.

"You're casting a huge shadow all over me!" Amy snapped, gesturing to Leshawna's shadow which was covering Amy's feet. "How am I supposed to get a tan with that in the way?"

"Girl you're wearing boots," Leshawna pointed out, "you wouldn't get a tan there anyways! Quit tryin' to a pick fight with me. You'll regret it."

"More like you'll be the one to regret it," Amy said, blowing a raspberry at Leshawna, who just rolled her eyes. "Ugh, so what's your plan anyway?"

"I'm not tellin' you," Leshawna said simply. "After what you pulled in the last challenge, I don't want to risk you trying to sabotage me."

"Did you take an extra stupid pill today or something?" Amy scoffed. "I was trying to help our team by sabotaging the enemy."

"That 'enemy' was your own sister," Leshawna said, poking Amy in the chest.

"Oh you did _not_ just poke me," Amy growled. She lightly shoved Leshawna, who shoved back even harder. "That's it!" Amy threw herself at Leshawna, but the girl moved to the side and tripped up the blonde, sending her face first into the dirt.

"At least let me take my earrings off," Leshawna scolded, quickly removing her earrings. "Now I hope you're hungry, because I'mma give you a knuckled sandwich with some whoopass, on the side of course."

"Ew even your slang is tacky," Amy said, rolling her eyes. She got to her feet. "And here I thought Samey was the biggest loser on this show. If we lose this challenge you are so getting eliminated." She stormed back toward her team.

"Now just where do you think you're going?" Leshawna asked. "We didn't even try to get the statue!"

"Who cares?" Amy shot back. "We both know we won't get it, and besides, do you really want to mess up your hair trying to win this when we both know you can't.

 **Confessional**

 **Leshawna:** Girl's a bitch, but she wasn't wrong. Besides, it's not like getting everyone to vote for one person isn't my specialty.

Leshawna and Amy returned empty-handed, meaning it was time for the Not-Favorites to go. Scarlett looked over who was left. B, while inventive, was too big of a target for a pack of angry lions. That of course left Sadie and Staci.

"We'll go together," Sadie said excitedly.

"That's a terrible idea," Scarlett told her. "If just one of you goes, it means the other gives us another chance at winning."

"But we have a plan," Sadie insisted. "Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaase?!"

"Ugh, fine," Scarlett said, uncovering her ears after Sadie's high-pitched screech. "I don't really care if either of you get eaten so whatever."

"Come on Staci," Sadie said, grabbing her friend's hand and pulling her into the grass.

"So what happens once they lose?" Courtney asked Chris. "Do we just get the automatic win?"

"I'm not sure," Chris admitted, "we didn't think you guys would be this terrible at the challenge. I guess we'll just pull a name out of a hat to see who wins. Chef, go get the hat." Chef nodded and left to go get said hat.

"So um, what is our plan?" Staci asked Sadie once they were in the tall grass.

"Okay," Sadie said, clapping her hands together, "so, I'm going to squeal really, like, loud. Like, _suuuuuuuper_ loud. And none of the mean lions will know where it came from. So while they're looking for me, you get to go get the statue!"

"But isn't there still one lion inside?" Staci asked.

"True," Sadie said, thinking for a little bit. "Oh! But remember, it's asleep with the other team's statue? So you just have to grab ours and get out. You can do it!"

"Um, okay," Staci said, smiling at the idea. "Let's do it, ya?"

"I'll go over here a little bit and then when you hear me, go for it," Sadie said. She walked a few meters away from Staci and gave her a wave. Staci began to slowly move toward the kojpe.

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" A loud, shrill squeal filled the air. Birds in the distance took flight, some nearby glass broke, and the lions scattered to figure out what was making the noise.

Staci ran as fast as she could, which wasn't that fast, until she was inside the kopje. Now she just needed to find the statue. She could she a glittering object underneath the male lion's paw, but she knew that wasn't her team's statue. Instead, she found the proper statue toward the back.

"Oh my gosh I did it," Staci said to herself. She picked up the statue and turned out to exit the kopje, only to come face to face with the now awake male lion. "Oh..."

The other contestants had heard Sadie's squeal, but were surprised that she hadn't come back yet. They sat around, most of them bored, as they waited to see what would happen.

"So," Samey whispered to Scarlett, "um...who do you think we should vote for if we lose?"

"You mean when we lose?" Scarlett whispered back. Samey winced, but didn't say anything. "Well it would seem this alliance of ours is starting earlier than I thought. I guess my vote would go between Ezekiel or Leonard. Neither are mentally strong, but I guess after today's challenge we could still manipulate Leonard. So we'll vote out Ezekiel."

"Okay..." Samey said, glancing at the farm boy. He hadn't said much since his attempt at the challenge, and was still sitting on the ground.

"Is there a problem with that choice?" Scarlett asked, her brow furrowing.

"No," Samey said quickly. "I'm fine with that. But who knows...maybe Staci and Sadie will come through for us."

Samey's opinion might have been different if she could see Staci, who was currently cowering behind a rock with the statue in her lap. The male lion clawed at her, but couldn't fit behind the rock to get to her.

"Please, please, please," Staci said, her hands pressed together and her head bent in prayer. "Save me ancestors! Oh I wish you were here great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandpa Wilkins. You invented lion taming. Or great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great aunt Velma, who invented spelunking. Ya."

Staci paused as a large yawn echoed through the kopje. She peered out from behind the rock to see the lion staring sleepily at her. He shook his head and then growled.

"Oh, do my stories about my relatives put you to sleep?" Staci asked, obviously not getting an answer because it was a lion. "Well...how about I tell you about my great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandmother Rachel. She invented fountains. Before then, water was just used for plumbing." Another yawn. "Or my great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great uncle Jack, who invented beans!"

The lion slumped down on the ground, but his eyes were still open. Staci took that as a sign that she needed to keep going. "Well...my great-great-great-great-great-great-great cousin twice removed named Humphrey invented hamsters. And before him, his dad invented hamster wheels. But hamsters hadn't been invented yet so they were just called wheels." Staci continued to go on and on about her relatives until the lion began to snore really loudly.

"Phew," Staci sighed with relief. "That was all the relatives I had." She stood up with the statue and, for some reason, felt a little lighter.

 **Confessional**

 **Staci:** I'm not sure why, but getting to share _all_ of my relatives with someone feels really good. Sort of like I don't have to tell them to everyone now. Unless I forgot some. Then I'll have to tell someone.

Staci exited the kopje to find everyone waiting at the start, including Sadie. Scarlett stormed over to her. "Where have you been?!" The redhead shouted. "It's almost sunset!" The sun was indeed almost setting.

"Well I was just in the cave and the lion scared me so I told him about all my relatives," Staci explained.

"Ugh, you should have gotten eaten by the lion for wasting our time and-" Scarlett stopped when she saw what Staci was holding. "Is that..."

"That's the Not-Favorites' statue!" Chris exclaimed. "Which means the Not-Favorites win!"

"Are you serious?!" Courtney cried as the Not-Favorites cheered. Well, some of them. Most of them were in complete shock that they had managed to win the challenge.

"That means I'll be seeing the Favorites at the elimination ceremony tonight," Chris said. "Now let's head back."

The two teams loaded back up into the vehicles and rode back to the resort. The Favorites were mostly quiet, save for a few glares exchanged between them. The Not-Favorites were buzzing with excitement.

"I knew you could do it!" Sadie squealed, hugging Staci. "You are _so_ brave. I never would have been able to go in that cave."

"Your Animal Husbandry skill must be even higher than mine," Leonard said in awe. Dave just rolled his eyes.

"Good job eh," Ezekiel said weakly, still not making eye contact with anyone.

"Yes, it would seem that I miscalculated," Scarlett remarked. "It doesn't happen often, and don't expect it to happen again. Nonetheless you have my gratitude for providing our team with victory. This time around."

"Thank you guys so much," Staci gushed. She was still holding the statue. "It really means a lot to me, ya."

Upon reaching the resort, Chris announced the reward for the winning team. "Not-Favorites, you get exclusive access to the resort's pool until the next challenge in a few days. You also get an endless supply of snack bar food. Enjoy."

The Not-Favorites went to go check out the pool or change into their swimsuits. It was almost nighttime, meaning the Favorites had little time to prepare for the upcoming ceremony.

"Don't worry team," Brick said as everyone prepared to split up. "Today was just a fluke. My code is that we always use a loss to prepare ourselves for a victory. Now maybe this is the wake up call some of us need to realize that if we don't work and train as a team we won't be getting-"

"Shut up!" Courtney interrupted.

Brick frowned. "Ma'am with all do respect-"

"I said shut up!" Courtney repeated. "Shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up!" She lunged at Brick, but Bridgette and Geoff held her back. "Gah!" Courtney screamed as she was dragged back toward her bungalow.

 **Confessional**

 **Brick:** Maybe it's time I took a less direct approach with Courtney. She's a very headstrong young woman, and I respect that, but my methods are proven to work in the actual military. She has to see that it'll work!

"I want him gone," Courtney said flatly as Bridgette and Geoff sat awkwardly on the couch of the bungalow the two girls shared with Brick.

"I understand your frustrations," Bridgette soothed, "but Brick means well. There's definitely some people I could do without seeing again. Like that Amy girl."

Geoff nodded. "She's not cool," he said.

There was a knock at the door of the bungalow. Geoff opened it and Brick nervously walked in. Courtney glared at him, but he quickly went upstairs.

"He is going down," Courtney said. There was another knock at the door. "Ugh, who could that be?!" Courtney walked to the door and opened it up, revealing Amy. "What do you want?"

"I'm just hear to let you in on a little secret," Amy said. "I share a bungalow with Leshawna, and thought you'd be interested in knowing that she's having a meeting to get you eliminated right now."

Courtney just looked at Amy, unimpressed. "Really?" She said. "And why is that?"

"She says you're a huge bitch," Amy continued. "And that she wants you out. So we should definitely team up and vote her out."

"Not happening," Courtney said, "good night." She slammed the door on Amy's face.

 **Confessional**

 **Amy:** Okay, wow, rude! Is it my fault that I want my lame-ass roommate gone so I can have the bungalow all to myself? Of course not!

Brick came downstairs. "Teammates," he said to Bridgette, Courtney, and Geoff with a polite nod, "I couldn't help but overhear the conversation that just occurred. It would seem that Leshawna is someone we need to vote for tonight."

"No way," Bridgette said, "Leshawna's my friend. I'm sure Amy was just lying."

"But what if she's not?" Brick asked. "A secret meeting would throw off our teamwork even more than it already is. It'd be best to take out this threat now then later. I would vote for her if that's what you want."

Something went off in Courtney's head, and she stood up. "Would you really?" She asked. Brick nodded. "Just to make things right between us?"

"Yes ma'am," Brick said, giving a salute. "I didn't mean any offense with what I said earlier. I respect your leadership."

"Yeah, yeah," Courtney said with a dismissive wave. "But really, you'll vote for Leshawna?" Another nod. "Good, because now that I think about it, Leshawna would be the type of person to hold a secret meeting against me."

"I'm glad we can work together on this ma'am," Brick said with a nod. "I'll see you at the ceremony." He went back upstairs to his "room".

"Courtney," Bridgette said worriedly once she heard the bathroom door shut, "what are you planning? You aren't really going to vote out Leshawna are you?"

Courtney smirked. "You're my friend, right Bridgette?" She asked. Bridgette nodded. Geoff stared at his girlfriend and her friend. "Good...and you're Leshawna's friend too right?"

"Of course," Bridgette replied. "And I don't want to choose between the two of you."

"You won't have to," Courtney promised, "because there's a way you can continue being a good friend to both of us."

 **Confessional**

 **Bridgette:** Looks like Geoff's not the only person I've forgotten what it's like to compete alongside. Courtney's good at this.

As it would turn out, Amy hadn't exactly been lying when she came to Courtney's bungalow. Leshawna _was_ having a meeting of sorts with her teammates, but they weren't after Courtney.

"I'm telling y'all," Leshawna said to the others in her bungalow, "we need to vote out Amy." Harold, Jasmine, and Dawn were sitting around the living room area, listening to her.

"Amy has one of the cruelest auras on the team," Dawn pointed out, "eliminating her would be quite wise."

"Yeah, she's bad news," Jasmine agreed. "I was on the same season as her, and she was vile. I'll gladly help you vote her out."

"I'll do anything for you my love," Harold said, taking Leshawna's hand. "Just say it and it'll be done."

"Thanks guys," Leshawna said. "It'll be nice having this bungalow to myself."

"There are only four of us here however," Dawn observed, "would it be a good idea to talk to some of the others to get a majority. Six people are needed to guarantee someone's elimination."

"Don't worry about that hon," Leshawna said confidently. "I'm sure there's at least two other people on this team that want Amy gone as badly as we do. Girl won't stand a chance."

"I will admit, I'm a little worried about the elimination ceremony," Dawn said. "Even if we are targeting Amy, my lack of participation in the challenge may be used against me."

"Don't sweat it," Jasmine told the aura whisperer, "I'm in the same boat. But that's why we all need to stick together and get rid of Amy before we worry about stuff like that."

"Don't worry about us either," Leshawna told the two girls, "Harold and I are cool with you two, so we won't vote you out. We gotta stick together." The others nodded in agreement.

* * *

Eventually, the contestants on the Favorites team were called to the elimination ceremony. They cast their votes and took their seats. Chris explained how the postcards were used and what elimination device would be utilized.

"Let's get started then," Chris said. "The first postcards go to...Bridgette, Geoff, Trent, and Noah." The first four contestants collected their postcards. "Next we have Courtney and Harold."

"Secret meeting to elimination me, huh?" Courtney asked Amy. The cheerleader just rolled her eyes.

Chris looked between the remaining five contestants. Leshawna, Jasmine, Dawn, Amy, and Brick. "Jasmine...Dawn...despite not competing in the challenge today, you two are safe with zero votes." Dawn let out a sigh of relief and took her postcard.

"Wait, why do I have votes?" Leshawna asked, confused. Bridgette shot Courtney a look, who just shrugged.

"Enjoy going home," Amy whispered to her. "I'm going to have fun living by myself."

"The next postcard goes to...

...

...

...Leshawna."

"What?!" Amy, Leshawna, and Bridgette said in unison. Leshawna caught her post-card while Amy's eyes widened.

Chris held up the final postcard. "Amy...Brick...only one of you will be receiving this postcard tonight. The other will be sent home, where they can never return...ever. That person is not...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...Amy." He tossed the postcard to the twin. "Brick, you're out."

"Already?!" Brick cried. "But...but I thought..." He turned to look at Courtney, who just glared at him. He sighed in defeat. "Well that's a shame. I was really looking forward to working with all of you. Sorry we couldn't make it last." He stood up and gave them a dejected salute.

"Yeah," Chris said, "where are those lions?"

"Lions?" Brick repeated. "What for-" A couple of snarling lions ran out from the bushes. Brick screamed and took off into the desert, the lions chasing after him. Chris laughed as the cadet disappeared over the horizon.

"Well I did _not_ see that coming," Chris said. "Way to once again be the more interesting team, guys. Now get out of here." The contestants got up and returned to their bungalows.

On the way back, Bridgette approached Courtney. "So you were never planning to eliminate Leshawna?" She asked.

"Nope," Courtney replied, "as much as Leshawna and I don't get along, I wanted Brick gone more. But I knew it would be hard to get your vote unless you needed to protect your friend. Sorry I sort of manipulated you."

"You _could_ have just told me you wanted my help," Bridgette pointed out, "but hey, it's fine. Just be honest with me next time, okay?" Courtney nodded. "Alright, goodnight." Courtney waved to her friend as they went to their separate rooms. The bungalow felt bigger now that one person was gone.

* * *

 _ **Voting Confessionals**_

 _ **Amy:** So I've never voted on this show for anyone but Samey before, but I guess I'll vote for Leshawna since I want the bungalow to myself. Buh-bye loser!_

 _ **Brick:** I'm a man of my word, and in keeping that word I am voting for Leshawna!_

 _ **Bridgette:** Courtney's right, the only way I can be a good friend to both her and Leshawna is to vote for Brick. Sorry, nothing personal..._

 _ **Courtney:** Brick! Duh! _

_**Dawn:** I must cast my vote for Amy. While I can feel my fellow teammates are planning other things, I must honor my commitment with Leshawna._

 _ **Geoff:** Bridgette says she's voting for Brick, and I agree with her. He's a nice dude, but he gets on people's nerves easily._

 _ **Harold:** Like Leshawna asked, I am voting for Amy._

 _ **Jasmine:** Amy's got to go. Even if Samey isn't around for her to bully on this team, she's just going to find someone else to make miserable._

 _ **Leshawna:** Do you even need to ask? I'm voting for Amy! _

_**Noah:** Meh...Brick's kind of annoying so...I guess I'll vote for him._

 _ **Trent:** Brick's kind of been rubbing me the wrong way the past few days, so I'm going to vote for him._

 **Votes:** Leshawna (2 - Amy, Brick), Amy (Dawn, Harold, Jasmine, Leshawna), Brick (5 - Bridgette, Courtney, Geoff, Noah, Trent)

* * *

 _ **Team Favorites:** Amy, Bridgette, Courtney, Dawn, Geoff, Harold, Jasmine, Leshawna, Noah, Trent_

 _ **Team Not-Favorites:** B, Dave, Ezekiel, Leonard, Sadie, Samey, Scarlett, Staci, Sugar, Topher_

 _ **Eliminated:** Max, Brick_

* * *

 **This elimination wasn't as easy of a decision to make as the last one. I knew Brick wasn't going to get very far, so I decided second out would be best for him. Don't get me wrong, I like him as a character, but when put on a team with people like Courtney and Noah who aren't really interested in being best friends, he's not going to do as well. I hope I didn't write him coming off as an intentional jerk, because he's more an annoyance to the others in this story. Oh, and he's fine, the lions didn't eat him or anything.**

 **That's all I've got! See you guys next time, don't forget to tell me your thoughts in a review!**


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